Falling for my boyfriend's Navy brother Chapter 143

What. The hell. Just happened?

My legs are still trembling. My pulse is so loud I can hear it in my ears, and I can’t even look at him.

I sit back on the edge of my bed, gripping the mattress like it’s the only thing keeping me from falling right to the floor. I try to breathe, but my lungs feel tight, like he’s still holding me, like his hand is still wrapped around my wrists, like his teeth are still grazing my throat.

I’ve never... I mean, I didn’t even know my body could feel like this. Like every single nerve ending is on fire. Like my skin is too tight, too sensitive, too everything. I’m pulsing. Every single part of me is pulsing, and he didn’t even kiss me.

What would that be like? If just being held by him, his hands gripping my waist, his fingers sliding into my hair, his chest pressed to mine — if just that turns my legs to liquid and scrambles my brain, what would actually being kissed by him do to me?

Or... more than that?

I choke on my own breath, heat flooding my face. What am I even thinking? I can’t think about him like this. I have a boyfriend.

Tyler.

God, Tyler.

I stare at the fire crackling in the hearth, at the shadows it casts on the walls. I have a boyfriend. Tyler.

Except...

Except I can’t even remember the last time Tyler touched me and made me feel like this. Like I might actually disintegrate. Like I’m made of sugar, and he’s about to devour me.

I squeeze my thighs together, trying to stop the spiraling heat, but it doesn’t help. All I can think about is Asher. His body caging mine. His mouth so close to my throat. The rough grip of his fingers on my wrists. His breath, hot and unsteady, brushing my ear when he told me to be careful.

God.

I need to stop. I need to get a grip. I need to talk to Tyler.

That thought makes my stomach turn.

Because what am I even going to say?

*“Hey, sorry I keep thinking about your brother in ways that are definitely not friendly and probably not appropriate, but I’m really sorry and we should try to be better, okay?”*

Yeah. Right.

And even if I did tell Tyler, even if I was honest and told him my brain has decided to betray me, that I can’t stop thinking about his brother’s hands, his voice, his damn eyes... what then?

I’ll break up with Tyler and ruin our relationship, and for what? So I can pine after a guy who probably doesn’t even see me as anything more than his brother’s clingy girlfriend?

Because sure, maybe Asher wants me. Physically. I mean... I felt it. Hard and, well, way too big for words. Pressing against my lower belly. But guys like Asher... they’re not starved for options. He’s probably used to women throwing themselves at him. He's probably used to waking up stunning, gorgeous women in his bed every morning.

And what am I to him? Just some tiny, clumsy, easily flustered girl who can’t even walk on ice without nearly cracking her head open.

I don’t have a chance with him. Not really.

And I’m not even sure I should want one.

I look at him from the corner of my eye. He’s still sitting on his bed, head tilted back against the wall, eyes closed, chest still rising and falling like he’s trying to calm down, too.

I bite my lip, heat still burning in my cheeks.

“Are you okay?” I blurt out, wincing at how breathless I sound.

His eyes crack open. Dark, stormy, a little wild around the edges. “You’re asking me?”

I flush harder. “Y-yeah. You seem... tense.”

His jaw ticks. He lets out a low breath, the muscle in his forearm twitching where his hand is gripping the mattress. “I’m fine.”

A small, disbelieving smile creeps onto my lips. “You don’t look fine.”

His eyes cut to mine, sharp, and I swear I feel it in my chest. “Careful.”

I suck in a breath, pulse kicking up again.

His gaze drops to my throat, then flicks back to my eyes. I swear his hand twitches, like he’s resisting the urge to reach out.

I look away, heart slamming into my ribs.

God, what is this?

What is happening to me?

I stare at the fire again, my mind racing. What if I ruin things with Tyler only to have Asher run for the hills when he realizes I’m just a mess of misplaced feelings and confusing crushes? What if he looks at me like I’m some deranged girl, desperate and pathetic?

No. I can’t.

I can’t.

I need to stop. I need to get a grip. I need to figure this out before I make a fool of myself.

Maybe tomorrow, if I can get a second alone with Tyler, I’ll talk to him. Just... feel things out. See if there’s still something worth salvaging.

But for now, I need to keep my distance. From both of them.

Especially *him*.

I glance at Asher again, just in time to see his eyes still locked on me, dark and hooded, like he can see every thought, every pulse, every tremor I’m trying to hide.

Heat floods my body all over again.

I drop my gaze, gripping my knees, trying to stop my hands from shaking.

Just breathe.

Just breathe.