A SECOND CHANCE AT FOREVER Chapter 37: CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

Ashley

The restaurant was wrapped in a warm, intimate glow, the soft flicker of candlelight making everything feel softer, more delicate—like the kind of moment I should be savoring. The low hum of conversation swirled around us, blending with the clinking of silverware and the occasional burst of laughter from a nearby table.

Ethan sat across from me, watching me the way he always did—like I was something precious. His dark eyes held an easy warmth, his smile gentle and patient, the kind that told me he was happy just to be here with me.

I wished I could say the feeling was mutual.

“You're quiet tonight," he observed, tilting his head slightly. "Something on your mind?"

Oh yeah. A lot of things.

Like how my ex-husband, the one I was supposed to be moving on from, had sent a package yesterday. A package filled with memories—nostalgia wrapped in brown paper and twine, tied up with the kind of ache that lingered long after the gift was opened.

I forced a small smile, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "Not really," I lied. "Just tired."

Ethan’s brow furrowed, his concern evident. "Long day?"

"You could say that." I picked up my water glass, taking a slow sip, hoping he wouldn’t push.

He didn’t. Instead, his lips quirked into a smirk as he leaned in slightly. "You know, if you ever need to vent, I’m a great listener. A very judgment-free listener."

I let out a soft chuckle, shaking my head. "I’ll keep that in mind."

Before the conversation could continue, the waiter approached our table, pen poised over his notepad. I reached for the menu, but before I could even glance at it, Ethan spoke.

"We’ll have the truffle risotto with a side of roasted asparagus for her."

My fingers froze midair, and I lifted my gaze to him, one brow arching in mild surprise. A smirk toyed at the corners of my lips

"How do you know I prefer it with asparagus?” I asked

Ethan leaned back in his chair, his grin widening as though he was pleased with himself. “Once I’m interested in someone, I make it my business to know everything about them. Now I know every tiny detail about you, Ashley.”

His words were meant to be sweet, reassuring even. Any other girl might have swooned at the thought of a man who paid such close attention.

But instead of warmth, I felt something else entirely.

A shift. A pull. A sharp tug in the back of my mind.

Before I could stop it, the restaurant blurred around me, the scent of rosemary and charred butter fading into something else entirely.

And just like that, I wasn’t sitting across from Ethan anymore.

I was years back in time.

With him.

\----

“I got it, Ashley! I secured the fucking deal!”

The door slammed open, shaking on its hinges as Kyle stormed inside, breathless with excitement. His eyes were bright, alive with the kind of uncontainable energy that made my heart race.

Before I could react, strong arms wrapped around my waist, lifting me effortlessly off the ground. A startled laugh broke from my lips as Kyle spun me in the air.

“Kyle!” I gasped between laughter, my hands gripping his shoulders. “Put me down!”

But he didn’t. Not immediately.

He held me tighter, his breath warm against my neck, exhilarated gasps breaking between his words.

“Do you know what this means, Ashley?” His voice was raw with triumph. “I’m in! I’m finally in! Blackwood is coming back stronger!”

When he finally set me down, his hands lingered at my waist, his chest still heaving. His eyes—deep, dark, intoxicating—locked onto mine, and for a moment, the entire world shrank to just us.

“Of course I know,” I murmured, my fingers brushing against his. “You’ve worked so hard for this.”

That night, Kyle insisted on celebrating. He was never the type to let a moment slip by without making it unforgettable.

"Somewhere special," he had said, grabbing his keys with a grin that told me he had already planned everything.

We ended up at FutChic, a small Italian bistro tucked away on a quiet street—the same one I had mentioned wanting to try months ago. I hadn’t even realized he had remembered.

The warm glow of candlelight flickered between us as we sat at a secluded corner table, the scent of fresh basil and garlic filling the space around us. Kyle reached across the table, intertwining his fingers with mine. 

He smirked, a glint of mischief in his eyes. “I ordered for you.”

I raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. “You did, did you? And how do you know what I want?”

Kyle leaned back, his smirk widening. “Because I know all your favorites, Freckles. I know what you’d want on a night like this.”

And he did.

He knew everything—the way I liked my coffee, the songs that made me smile, the books I re-read when I was feeling down. He knew how I tapped my fingers on the table when I was deep in thought, how I got quiet when something upset me but didn’t want to talk about it yet.

He knew me in a way that no one else ever had.

Or ever would.

The night felt magical, like we were the only two people in the world. The candlelight painted soft golden hues across his features, making his sharp jawline even more defined. We laughed, we talked about the future—our future.

And for a while, everything was perfect.

I remembered the way he had looked at me then. The way his gaze had held an intensity that made my stomach flip, that made me feel seen—like I was the center of his universe.

Like we had all the time in the world.

But time had been cruel.

The memory fractured, splintering at the edges, and just like that—

The laughter faded.

The candlelight dimmed.

Kyle’s touch slipped away, replaced by the cold, empty space between me and Ethan.

–

I blinked hard, forcing myself back into the present.

The restaurant. The candlelight. The scent of truffle and garlic.

Ethan was still looking at me, his eyes filled with quiet concern. He was saying something—his lips moving, his voice gentle—but the words didn’t quite reach me.

I nodded absently, offering a smile I didn’t quite feel. My hands, still clenched beneath the table, ached from the tension I hadn’t realized I was holding. Slowly, I forced them to relax, pressing my palms against my lap to ground myself.

Kyle was gone.

But somehow, he was still here.

I exhaled slowly, lifting my gaze back to Ethan. His smile was still there, genuine and patient, waiting for me to fully return to the moment. He was steady in a way that should have comforted me. The kind of man I should be able to fall for.

So why did it feel like something was missing?

Why, after all this time, did Kyle’s presence still linger like a phantom, an echo in the deepest corners of my mind?

I shouldn’t be thinking about him. Not now. Not here.

I reached for my glass of water, taking a sip as if that could wash away the thoughts threatening to pull me under. But the moment I set it down, Ethan reached across the table, his fingers brushing against mine before gently taking my hand. His thumb traced light circles over my skin, his touch warm. Reassuring.

But it wasn’t the same.

It didn’t send a thrill through my veins. It didn’t make my breath hitch.

It didn’t make me feel alive.

I hated myself for comparing. For measuring Ethan against a man who had long since walked out of my life. A man who had torn me apart and left me to put myself back together. But no matter how much I tried to push Kyle away, he remained etched into me, woven into every fiber of my being.

I knew I should let him go. Knew I had to, for my own sake.

But the truth was, I didn’t know how.

Ethan’s voice pulled me back. “Ashley?”

I blinked, realizing I had completely missed whatever he had just said.

His brows knitted together, concern flashing in his eyes. “Are you okay?”

I forced another smile, nodding quickly. “Yeah. Just—distracted. Sorry.”

Ethan studied me for a long moment before squeezing my hand again. “You know, you don’t always have to pretend you’re okay.”

His words were soft, but they hit harder than I expected.

I opened my mouth, ready to assure him that I was okay, that I was just lost in thought. But I couldn’t bring myself to say it. Because deep down, I wasn’t sure if it was true.

Instead, I looked down at my empty plate, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on me. Ethan was sweet. Attentive. Thoughtful.

Everything I should want.

So why did it feel like my heart was still chasing something it could never have again?

Why did I still feel Kyle’s presence in the spaces Ethan couldn’t quite fill?

I swallowed hard, my throat tight.

Maybe time hadn’t healed me as much as I’d thought. Maybe moving on wasn’t as simple as finding someone new, someone safe.

Maybe a part of me would always belong to Kyle.

And maybe that was the problem.