From Rejected Mate to Luna Chapter 84

Matthew's POV

"That was the most nerve-wracking dinner I've ever had in my life," I confessed to James as we walked through the community center's security area the morning after my date with Julia.

James tried to suppress a smile but failed miserably. "The mighty Alpha of Spring Valley, terrified of a dinner date? Now that's something I never thought I'd hear."

I rolled my eyes, but there was no denying the truth in his words. Last night had left me more anxious than facing down a group of rogues. I'd spent hours preparing—researching restaurant reviews online, calling in a favor with Marco, the restaurant owner, to reserve the best table with a view of both the forest and the exit. I'd even tried on five different outfits before settling on the dark bule button-down that Olivia had once mentioned would bring out my eyes.

Hati, my wolf, had laughed at me the entire time. *You're acting like a teenage pup before his first howl ceremony,* he'd teased as I debated between hiking boots and dress shoes.

*Shut up,* I'd growled back. *Everything has to be perfect.*

"Did you actually ask her for permission to kiss her?" James interrupted my thoughts, his eyebrows raised in amused disbelief.

I felt heat rising to my cheeks. "How did you—"

"Olivia," he said simply. "Julia called her this morning. Apparently, it made quite the impression."

Great. Now I was the talk of the pack women's gossip circle.

"I just wanted to be sure," I muttered. "After everything with Nathan, I didn't want to..." I trailed off, not quite able to articulate it.

James's expression softened. "Hey, I'm just giving you a hard time. It was the right move." He paused, then added with a wicked grin, "But please tell me you at least knew what you were doing once she said yes."

I groaned, remembering my panicked research the day before. "I may have asked you for advice on kissing techniques yesterday."

"Which you completely ignored," James laughed. "I spent twenty minutes explaining the perfect approach, and you look like you've forgotten all of it."

"I was nervous," I admitted, running a hand through my hair. "I even drove to the restaurant to make sure the table would be right. Marco probably thinks I've lost my mind."

James shook his head. "Matt, she just wanted to spend time with you, not judge your date planning skills."

I sighed, leaning against the wall. "I know. But after everything she's been through... I just wanted to give her something normal. Something good."

I hadn't told James how I'd stopped at the meadow to pick wildflowers instead of buying roses, worried that formal flowers might remind Julia of Nathan's ostentatious displays. Or how I'd arrived exactly on time, not wanting to be early and pressure her, nor late and cause anxiety. These small calculations had consumed my thoughts all day.

When Julia had opened her door, I'd momentarily forgotten how to speak. She'd worn a simple blue dress that brought out the warm honey tones in her eyes, her hair loose around her shoulders. Hati had practically howled with appreciation.

*Say something, you idiot,* he'd prompted when I'd stood there staring.

I'd finally managed to hand her the wildflowers, noting the slight tremble in her fingers as she took them. The realization that she was nervous too had somehow made me feel better—we were both navigating uncertain territory.

"The thing is," I continued, "I kept second-guessing every move. Was I sitting too close? Was I talking too much about pack history? Should I offer to refill her wine glass or would that seem like I was pushing alcohol?"

James laughed outright. "You were analyzing it like a territory security assessment."

"Exactly! I kept catching myself thinking in Alpha mode—assessing threats, planning contingencies—when I should have just been enjoying her company." I shook my head at my own ridiculousness. "But then... she smiled. A real smile, not the polite one she gives at pack meetings. And suddenly, I felt like I'd accomplished something more important than any Alpha duty."

As we talked, I remembered how Julia had gradually relaxed throughout dinner, her shoulders lowering, her laugh becoming more frequent. The way she'd leaned forward when discussing her research, eyes bright with passion. How different she was from the guarded, tense woman who'd first arrived at Spring Valley.

"The strangest part," I said more quietly, "was realizing that thoughts of Rachel didn't bring the usual knife-twist of pain."

James went still, his joking manner fading. Rachel had been his friend too.

"I still felt her absence," I clarified. "But it was... gentler somehow. Like a sad echo rather than an open wound." I struggled to explain the complex emotions. "With Rachel, everything was instinctive—the mate bond guided us. With Julia, there's no mystical connection telling me what to do or how to feel. Every moment is a choice, every connection something we have to build ourselves."

"And that's... good?" James asked carefully.

"It's real," I replied. "It's earned. There's something precious about that."

I didn't tell him about the walk after dinner—how carefully I'd measured the distance between us, close enough to talk easily but not so close that Julia might feel trapped. How the moonlight had filtered through the trees, painting silver patterns across her face when we'd stopped by the stream.

"I rehearsed asking for that kiss about fifty times in my head," I admitted. "I was terrified she'd say no. More terrified I'd offend her by asking."

"And?" James prompted.

"And none of your techniques mattered," I said with a small smile. "There was no calculated angle or perfect pressure. Just... her. Just us."

The moment her lips had met mine, Hati had practically danced with joy inside me. Not the desperate howling relief of a mate bond, but something quieter and just as powerful—a connection forged through choice rather than fate.

"I walked her back to her quarters afterward," I continued. "The whole time I wanted to reach for her hand, but I didn't want to push." I'd settled for a gentle kiss on her knuckles at her door, savoring the soft intake of her breath.

James studied me with an unusually serious expression. "You know, for all your overthinking and preparation, it sounds like things went perfectly."

"They did," I agreed. "But not because of my planning. It worked because it was her. Because it was us."

We reached the end of the hallway, where James would head to the nursery to check on Olivia and the baby, and I would continue to my office.

"Rachel would be happy for you," James said quietly. "She'd want this for you."

I nodded, throat tight. "I know."

As James turned to leave, he called over his shoulder, "Next time, maybe skip the five outfit changes, though!"

I laughed, shaking my head as I continued toward my office. The truth was, I'd probably still overthink everything with Julia. Not because I was afraid of making mistakes, but because she deserved every ounce of consideration I could give her.

What I'd realized last night, watching her smile in the moonlight, was that there was a profound difference between the love ordained by fate and the love that grows from choice. One was a gift, miraculous and undeniable. The other was built, day by day, decision by decision.