Where The Ice Gives Way Chapter 86

**Charlotte**

For a few seconds after I pull away from Blake, I can’t seem to do anything except sit there and breathe. The room feels warmer than it did before. Smaller too, somehow, like the walls have come back closer now that whatever that was has ended. My heart is still beating too hard. My skin still feels full of the field. The grass. The wind. Lex’s fur against Shanti’s. That quiet, calming peace still sits low inside me, like something glowing gently under my ribs. I look down at my hands. They don’t feel like they belong to me yet. Blake sits up beside me more slowly, dragging one hand over the back of his neck. Mara, on the other hand, looks completely unbothered. She sits on the couch now, tea towel folded over one knee, her expression calm as she studies both of us. She waits until we’re properly upright before she says, very simply, “What did you see?” I glance at Blake, and he’s already looking at me. I swallow. “I saw a field,” I say quietly. “At first.” Mara gestures for me to keep going. “I saw the grass and felt the wind and heard the water somewhere close.” I shake my head slightly, trying to find the right words for it. “It started the way you said it would. I thought I was... picturing it.”

“But then you weren’t,” Blake says beside me, and I look at him, trying to figure out if he definitely saw what I saw. I give up and turn back to see Mara’s eyes soften, and I drag in a breath. “I was Shanti. Or with her. I don’t know how to explain it properly.” My fingers curl together in my lap. “I wasn’t controlling her. She was moving, and I was just... there. Inside it. Feeling it with her.” Blake hums in agreement. “Same with Lex.” That makes me look at him again. Was he really there? Did he see what I saw? Mara leans back slightly against the couch. “And?” I blink. “And what?” A small smile touches her mouth. “And who did you find?” Heat rises into my face so quickly that it almost makes me angry. I glance away. “Blake. Well, actually, Lex.” Beside me, I feel him move on the carpet, but I don’t dare look at him. I keep my eyes on Mara, watching her smile deepen. “And what did your wolves do?” My cheeks go even hotter. “They found each other,” I mutter.

Mara lifts one brow, and I let out a breath and decide to say it. “They knew each other straight away. There wasn’t any doubt.” I look down at my hands again. “They just... went to each other.” The room goes quiet for a second. Then Mara nods once, slowly, as if something has clicked into place for her, too. “Well,” she says softly. “I didn’t know that’s what would happen.” She looks between us both. “You were meant to go inward. To find the place where your mind is quiet enough that your wolves can move without all the human noise sitting over the top of them.” Her fingers tap lightly against the arm of the couch. “You were meant to find the place where you are at peace.” I think of the field again, of the stillness. The way everything inside me softened the second Shanti lay down beside Lex in the grass. Mara’s eyes rest on me. “If they found each other there...” Her mouth curves. “Well. It speaks for itself.” Mara lets the quiet sit for another beat before she leans forward, resting her elbows lightly on her knees. “All it takes to use a muscle is knowing how it feels to use it,” she says. “To know it’s there. To know where it sits in your body and how to reach it again.” I frown slightly, listening. “Inner peace is much the same,” she continues. “People talk about it like it’s some unreachable thing, like it floats around above your head and you either have it or you don’t.” She shakes her head. “It isn’t like that. It’s a place. A feeling. A state you can learn to return to.” Mara points lightly toward my chest. “Now that you know where your peace is, you know how to find it.”

I know what it was like to be inside Shanti without fear muddying everything now, to feel calm wash through both of us. That feeling, though, only came because of Blake and Lex. Mara watches me carefully as she says, “Now you know where to go when you need it.” I sit with that for a long second. “What if I can’t get back there?” I ask quietly. She glances at Blake, then back at me. “You will,” she says, and that’s it, that’s all she gives me. Blake finally speaks again, his voice lower than before. “It felt real.” I turn to him, and he’s still looking at me, his elbows braced on his knees now, hands loose between them. “It was,” Mara says, and then she gets up to leave. Before she does, she looks down at both of us, “True, inner peace is valuable. Don’t shy away from it. Learn to embrace the place that makes your whole self feel safe.” 

The door closes softly behind her. I don’t move, and neither does Blake. Mara’s words linger in the space she leaves behind, sitting heavy and quiet in my chest. I stare down at the rug, tracing its pattern without really seeing it, my thoughts caught somewhere between the field and this room. Between what I felt there… and what I’m supposed to do with it now. Safe. Calm. Centred. I know what that feels like now. I know where it is. Slowly, without thinking too hard about it, my hand moves across the rug until my fingers brush Blake’s. For a second, I think maybe I should pull back, but I don’t. Instead, I look up. Blake is already looking down at our hands, his eyes just slightly wide, like he didn’t expect it either. Slowly, his fingers turn under mine. They slide between my own, locking our hands together. It sends a soft rush through me. Along with the butterflies in my stomach, there’s a quiet hum that settles low in my chest and spreads outward, the same way the field did. I let out a slow breath, close my eyes, and let myself feel it. The calm. The stillness. It’s not as wide as the field, not as endless… But it’s there. Right here. With him.