War Girls Complete Collection Chapter 76

Chapter 21

A

t the end of the long evening, Peter dropped off the professor at his residence in Oranienburg. Anna slipped into the front passenger seat, and then they made the long drive back to the Charité.

“Did you have a nice evening?” Peter asked, his eyes glued to the dark road.

“Yes. But it was also surreal.”

“Surreal?”

“All the luxuries, the beautiful dresses, the jewelry of the women, the food, the champagne, while the rest of Berlin starves.”

Silence hung between them until Peter raised his voice again. “I know. It feels so wrong – that I have such a good life, while my family struggles.”

Anna turned her head, since it was the first time he’d mentioned his family. “You said you were raised on a farm? Shouldn’t they be better off in the country? I know my Aunt Lydia is. They have much more food than we do, since they can grow some themselves.”

“It’s complicated.” Peter sighed. “One day after the war, I hope I can show you my home.”

“That would be nice.” Anna’s heart fluttered, and she wished she could be more affectionate with him. She yearned to be in his arms, to kiss him, to feel his touch on her skin. But whenever they were alone together, and he tried to be more intimate, she froze up, unable to leave the memories of Doctor Tretter’s abuse behind.

She gave a loud sigh, wishing things could be different. Peter didn’t deserve her ice-cold responses when she wanted to thaw for him more than anything.

“What’s wrong, my sweet Anna?” Peter asked and put a hand on her thigh. Anticipation coursed through her veins, and she made the decision that she would not let the lingering shadows of T the devil ruin her love for Peter. She wouldn’t allow the past to control her future. Not any more.

“Nothing is wrong, but I thought it would be nice if you could stay at my place tonight,” Anna said. There…she’d done it and said the words before she could take them back.

“Wow! That’s unexpected,” he said in a husky voice and she could hear his breathing speed up. “You sure about this?”

“Yes.” Her voice reflected more confidence than she felt. Deep inside her stomach a knot of fear formed, ready to burst apart and flood her system with panic. But she needed to do this, if she ever wanted to be free.

He stopped the car for a moment and gazed at her. “Just know that I love you either way.”

Anna nodded and raised her lips to receive his kiss. The knot in her stomach still lingered, but being in Peter’s arms felt too good, too safe to let the fear overtake her. When he released her mouth, she rubbed his scratchy beard and said, “I love you too, Herr Wolf.”

“I have to stop at my place first,” he said as he started the engine again. “It won’t take long. Should I take you home and come by later?”

“No, I can wait for you in the automobile.” Anna twisted her fingers.

When he pulled the Mercedes to a stop, he opened the door and then looked at her, tension rolling off of him, saying, “You sure you can wait here? I won’t be long.”

Anna nodded. It was rather unusual that he didn’t invite her in to wait. He probably didn’t want to make her walk up the three floors wearing her high heels. And she didn’t mind a few moments to herself to bolster her courage for what she had planned.

The minutes rolled by and after fifteen minutes of sitting in the cold car, she began to wonder what was taking Peter so long. He must have forgotten the time working on something for the professor.

After five more minutes, she decided to check up on him. She knocked on the door, and when no answer came, worry attacked her. She turned the knob and the door sprang open, but the sitting room was empty and the bathroom door stood half open. That was more than a little worrisome, and her neck hair stood on end.

She should probably leave. But then she heard the sound of rhythmic tapping coming from behind his closed bedroom door.

“Peter?” she said, hesitantly. “Is that you?”

But no answer came. Her heart thumping furiously in her throat, she approached the bedroom door. The rhythmic tapping stopped for a moment and she closed her eyes. But then it started again.

Anna opened the door, and gasped when she saw Peter bent over a suitcase holding something that looked like a sophisticated radio, his forefingers feverishly hitting a switch. Peter jumped up, slamming the suitcase shut and drawing his Mauser. His eyes opened wide when he recognized her, and the hand with the pistol dropped to his side.

“What…what are you doing here?” he stammered.

“I got cold and tired of waiting. But I should ask what you are doing!” Anna barely kept herself from yelling at him.

“We need to talk,” Peter said, and locked the suitcase before he pushed it behind the closet.

She nodded, her face ashen, and her previous plan of sleeping with him tonight flew from her mind as she considered the implications of what she’d just seen. “So this is what you’ve been hiding from me. Who the hell are you?”

“Anna, let’s go into the other room and talk. I’ll explain everything,” he begged her.

Like a puppet on strings she returned to the front room, seating herself on the edge of the chair. “Explain!”

“My sweet Anna.” He tried to take her hand into his, but she moved away. As her mind raced, his deception became bigger, turning into a raging giant. Had she not seen his betrayal with her own eyes, she’d never have believed it could be true.

“I was transmitting a message to London, warning them about the planned bombing that was discussed at the event.” He sighed, his eyes pleading with her to trust him. But how could she trust a man who’d deceived her about his true person? Who worked for the enemy?

“Why?” Anna whispered. She’d known he was not a fervent Nazi like so many others, but this? Her head ached with the revelation and the implications.

“I’m Polish. I escaped to Britain right after Hitler invaded and defeated our army. It was my duty to continue the fight to free my country.” He bit down on his lower lip.

“You’re a Pole – that explains it,” Anna said, remembering the muttered words in his sleep. “And an English spy. Oh, I was so stupid.” She hid her face between her hands. The man she had trusted, the man she had loved – a liar.

“Anna, I’m sorry you had to find out this way. I wanted to tell you, but I wasn’t sure if…”

“If you could trust me?” she spat out the words. “The question is how I could ever think of trusting you? You’re betraying my fatherland…” Sobs bubbled up in her chest and it took all her self-control to swallow them down.

“Will you call the Gestapo on me?” he asked, and she believed she saw him shiver with fear.

“No.” She sighed, her confusing emotions making it hard to form a clear thought. “It’s not so much what you did – still do – that bothers me, but that you never told me.”

“Can you forgive me?” he asked, his eyes full of sadness.

“I don’t know.” She shrugged and stood. “I will go home now.”

“I’ll walk you–”

“No.” Her voice was sharper than intended, but she needed to be alone. Away from the effect he had on her body.

“You’re sure?” Peter searched her face and then sighed before nodding.

“Next time, lock the door,” she said, and left his apartment without looking back.

The five-minute walk to her building wasn’t nearly long enough to clear her thoughts, and she flopped down on the small couch, staring at the ceiling. Everything had become a whole lot more complicated.

She shouldn’t be surprised. She’d always know that Peter was hiding a dark secret. But she’d also known that he was a good man, a man of integrity. He had no choice but to fight for his country. Fight against the Nazi evil.

Anna started bawling. It seemed everyone around her was involved in fighting the Nazis. Devout, obedient Ursula smuggled Jews out of the country, Lotte wanted to become a spy for the Allies, and Peter…he was a Polish soldier, and a spy.

And her?

She had the career she’s always dreamed of, but her excitement over that epic achievement had dissolved like mist in the wind within the last hour. In the bigger picture, where things truly mattered, she was a complete and utter failure.

Not only didn’t she oppose the regime that had brought terror and destruction to all of Europe, but she’d also become a spoke in their wheel. A puppet using her mind and gifts to their benefit.

How could I have let it come to this?