Cruel Paradise - A Mafia Romance Chapter 143

Ben glances down distractedly. Then his eyes catch on the words. “T-these are custody papers.”

“Oh, how wonderful—it can read,” Ruslan snarls sarcastically. “Once you sign those papers, legal and physical custody will pass from you to Emma.”

He shakes his head. “If I do that… I-I’ll lose them…”

“You mean you’ll lose your bargaining power? You’ll lose control of Emma? Without those children, you can’t make her take your shit. That’s what you’re really afraid of losing, aren’t you?”

Ben turns to me again, his eyes bright with pitiful tears. His nose is still gushing blood and snot, but he doesn’t even seem to notice.

“Em, listen to me. I know I haven’t been the best father or b-brother to you—”

“I warned you not to do that,” Ruslan rumbles.

Ben continues as though Ruslan hadn’t spoken. “—but I-I’m just so fucking miserable all the time. Without her, without my Sienna, nothing seems worth it. She was my everything. She was my whole fucking world. P-please… don’t let him do this…”

I can understand why he’s going with this strategy. It’s worked for him in the past. In the months after Si’s death, I’d done my best to care for him. It’s a phase, I thought. It’ll pass, I thought. But as the months went by and Ben just kept getting worse and worse, I realized that he wasn’t just using me; he was using Sienna, too.

He was using her death as an excuse to let himself go, to stop trying, to stop caring.

I could have forgiven him if it was just me. But I can’t forgive him for what he’s cost those children. I won’t forgive him for what he’s put them through.

“I gave you so many chances, Ben,” I say softly. “I begged you to be better for those kids. You keep using Sienna as an excuse, but the truth is, if she were here right now, she’d be so damn ashamed of you.”

His face crumples up and he looks away. He doesn’t look at either one of us when he speaks again. “Y-you can’t make me sign those papers.”

I close my eyes. Oh no, Ben. You shouldn’t have said that.

When I open them again, I see Ruslan squatting so he’s eye level with Ben. “Let me be very clear. You have two choices here: sign and you get to live. Refuse? You die and we get the kids anyway.”

I do a confused double-take. Did he just say “we”?

Ben sneers, blood crusting around his upper lip. “Why let me live at all?”

Ruslan shrugs. “Because I don’t want to be responsible for taking away their last living parent. Even if he is a worthless piece of shit.”

Tears pool in my eyes. I know exactly what it means for someone like Ruslan to walk away from a man like Ben without exacting his pound of flesh. The only reason Ben is being given a choice at all is because of how much Ruslan loves those kids.

“Fine,” he spits at last. “I’ll sign.”

Ruslan flings a pen at him and I watch with bated breath as Ben scribbles on the dotted line. Once he’s signed the last page, I wait for the relief to hit, but still—nothing.

It hasn’t quite sunk in yet.

Ruslan picks up the papers and folds them closed. “Just a little parting advice: the moment you wake up, I’d start looking for another state to move to. I don’t ever want to see you again.”

Ben’s eyebrows knit together. “W-wake up?”

This time, I’m expecting the blow. Ruslan’s right arm swings forward and makes violent contact with the side of Ben’s temple. Ben’s eyes roll back and his body goes limp.

He looks oddly fake like this. Not a person anymore. Not a part of my life.

If I ever see him again, he’ll be a stranger.

Ruslan rises back to his feet and stretches. “He should come to in a few hours, don’t worry.”

I frown. I’m not worried. Not about Ben, anyway.

“Come on,” he says, holding out a hand. “Let’s go home.”

Let’s go home. What a sentence. Still dazed, I take Ruslan’s hand and follow him back into his SUV, trying to process everything that just happened.

Are the kids really mine? After all this time, I finally get them all to myself without the burden of having to deal with Ben?

It feels surreal. It feels too good to be true.

I sneak a glance at Ruslan as we drive back to the estate. He hasn’t said a word. But… all that back there—it has to mean he believes me now, right?

Somehow, I can’t bring myself to ask.

Because every time I feel like I’m on solid ground with Ruslan, something happens that reminds me that it’s all just shifting quicksand that’s just pretending to be concrete. It’s only real for a moment—then reality drags me further down.

The moment we get back to the house, I run upstairs to check on the kids. All three are tucked in their beds, sleeping peacefully. I back out of Josh’s room and collide with Ruslan. His hands shoot out and grab me, twisting me around to face him.

“You okay?”

He asks the question softly, like he truly cares about the answer.

I open my mouth but only a sob comes out. “Sorry,” I croak before I turn tail and run into my bedroom.

He follows me in there. The moonlight coming through the window casts everything in a fake-looking silvery glow. If this ends up being nothing but a very realistic dream, I’m gonna be pissed tomorrow.

But even when I blink, even when I pinch myself, it doesn’t go away.

It stays.

I stay.

He stays.

I drop to a seat at the edge of my bed and try to breathe deeply. I need to trust what just happened. I saw Ben sign those papers with my own two eyes.

“Emma.”

I look up and Ruslan is standing in front of me. Before I can think of something to say, he’s kneeling down.

“I made a mistake, Emma,” he says gently. “I should never have believed that you were capable of betraying me. I should have trusted my instincts.”

I feel strangely numb. How long have I waited for him to say these exact words?

“Then why didn’t you?”

Those amber eyes are burning with intensity. “Because you always felt too good to be true. I was terrified from the beginning that I would lose you. I suppose, when Kirill came to me with the news that Remmy had gotten his hands on our contract, it was like a self-fulfilling prophecy coming to life. I was so scared of losing you that I told myself it was easier if I was the one who pushed you away first.” He clears his throat, eyes falling down for a moment. Then he drags them back up to meet mine. “I can’t change the past, Emma. All I can do now is make it up to you.”

My breath is pinned in my throat. “How do you plan on doing that?”