Cruel Paradise - A Mafia Romance Chapter 144

“By giving you my time and attention, to start with. By showing you with time and patience just how important you are to me. And, for right now, with an orgasm or five. For as long as you want it.”

My heart flutters and suddenly, I’m not numb anymore. In fact, there’s a whole lot going on right now and it’s emanating from my nether regions.

Focus, Emma. Don’t let your vagina think she’s in charge.

I meet his scorching gaze. “I don’t want this to be just sex anymore, Ruslan.”

He doesn’t flinch away from those words. “It’s so, so much more than that.” He takes my hand and pulls it to his lips. He kisses my knuckles gently and looks at me with a smile that makes my insides turn to putty. “Let me prove it.”

How can I say no to that?

33

EMMA

He really does want to make it up to me.

That’s the last coherent thought in my head as Ruslan starts to eat me out, his tongue slowly sucking away the tension in my spine and the wariness in my heart.

He’s got his hands on the backs of my thighs as my legs rest on his shoulders. I spend the next five minutes on the very cusp of a drool-worthy orgasm, but every time I’m close, he keeps pulling back, teasing me with the promise of all the pleasure he’s about to unleash on me.

It doesn’t take long before I’m nothing more than a quivering mess of nerve endings. But my sensitivity doesn’t just begin and end with my body. I’m on the verge of tears, too. The last few months come to me in short bursts.

Our first real kiss.

The first time we slept together, how nervous I was. How he stripped away my clothes, then my fears. What a good girl you are. Spread your legs for me. Now—touch yourself.

The night I realized I wasn’t his date, that that privilege belonged to Jessica Allens.

When I woke up in the hospital and he was right there with me. All the unpleasantness that followed…

None of it changed how I felt about him. He was still the man who saved me from being Ben’s puppet and my parent’s stooge. He gave Josh new confidence and fresh hope and showed him how to be something besides just another angry, broken man with no outlet for his pain. He showed the girls what it’s like to have a strong male figure ever-present in their lives. Thanks to him, both Caroline and Reagan will pick men worth their time instead of trying to correct past traumas by pursuing hollow carbon copies of their fucked-up father.

He’s the savior I never dreamed of asking for.

He’s also the cause of so much of the pain and trauma he saved me from.

But how do you separate those things? One flows into the other and then back into itself. He’s not all good and he’s not all evil. He’s something in between. Superhero and flawed human all in one.

And now, he’s mine.

All mine.

Just like I’ve been his from the start.

His tongue glides over my clit and I gasp, my body twitching with pleasure. “Ruslan…” I moan. “I can’t… ahh…”

He keeps stroking my clit with his tongue until I feel the orgasm finally take over, roaring through me until it shrouds my body in warmth.

“That’s it, my little kiska. Let go. Just fucking let go.”

I want to. God, I so badly want to. But letting go isn’t that easy for me anymore. Quicksand imitating concrete is still not concrete.

I blink and his face hovers over me, those scorching amber eyes clearer than I’ve ever seen them.

“You’re crying,” he whispers.

I touch my face and discover that he’s right. Tears wet my cheeks and I’m too tired, too spent to wipe them away. So Ruslan kisses them off my face, making me shudder with new desire.

“Why are you crying?” he asks gently when he’s swallowed my tears.

I give him the honest answer. “I don’t know.”

We’re lying in the comfort of my bed, skin to skin, nothing between us. His cock is pressed between my legs, nestled gently against my pussy. He’s hard as rock but his erection isn’t demanding.

“Yes, you do. You’re just afraid to say it out loud.”

I hate that he knows me that well. “H-how can I trust this?” I whisper.

“How can you trust me, you mean?” His finger does slow circles on my naked abdomen. “It won’t happen overnight. It’ll take time.” He keeps kissing my neck. And my ears. And my face. And my breasts. It makes it very hard to pay attention to what he’s saying between the kisses. “It’ll take months of orgasms. Months of romantic dinners and expensive gifts. Months of nights like this, lying here and talking about everything or nothing at all. Maybe it’ll take years of all those things. And I’m okay with that.”

I almost smile. “I don’t need expensive gifts.”

“You’re gonna get them anyway.”

“You can’t buy me, Mr. Oryolov.”

He lifts his head and looks down at me. I was teasing, but he’s not smiling at all. “I know that,” he says with a fierceness that takes me back. “I’m not trying to buy you; I’m trying to earn you.”

“That’s not how you do it.”

I would have thought this conversation would deflate his erection but he’s still hard as ever. Maybe that’s why my pussy is dripping all over his tip.

“Then tell me how.”

“By being with me. By talking to me. By making me your equal partner.”

His lips follow my collarbone down to my breast. He circles the nipple with his tongue and sucks on it delicately. “I’ve never had an equal partner in my life. But I’m willing to learn how.”

Excitement spreads through my chest. I feel hot and cold at the same time. “Really?”

“Really.” He pulls himself up a little and pushes my legs open a little wider. His cock slides up and down my slit. I’m so wet that his head slides in easily.

I moan. “Ruslan…”

“Any other demands before we forget how to talk, my little kiska?”

He’s still not all the way inside me and yet I can’t focus on a damn thing but the feeling of him between my legs. I want him deep—I want him to fill me up until I lose myself in him. I’m writhing around beneath him so much, trying to force him inside me, that he pulls out completely.

“We’re having an important conversation,” he scolds, like I’m the one doing all the teasing.

I grit my teeth. There is it again—emotional quicksand.

“I-I… ahh… can’t think…”

His tongue slides around my earlobe. Around and in and over. “What do you want?” he rasps.

Unexpected words fly out of my mouth before I can stop them. “I want to be your dirty little whore.”

He chuckles and that sound alone makes me decide that this is exactly the point I want to make. Because right now, all that matters is his cock at my pussy and his lips on my skin.

“My dirty little whore, hm?” he growls, grinding his cock back against my slit. He’s still not all the way in, though. He’s driving me crazy on purpose.

I bite down on my bottom lip. “Mm-hm…”