Losing Control : His Madness, His Cure Chapter 186

The words land in me like a quiet echo. There’s a kind of grace in the way he says it, no bitterness or regret. Just a man who found something beautiful on the other side of wreckage.

“That’s really incredible....and inspiring,” I say finally.

Albert laughs softly. “Nah. It’s just living. You get broken, you build again. Just depends what you build next.”

I nod subtly, then look back over my shoulder almost on instinct. Jax is by the shelves near the window, where bundles of dried herbs hang upside down, the light threading through them like smoke. He’s studying the labels, something thoughtful in the way his fingers hover over a jar before picking it up. But he must feel me watching, because he turns. Our eyes catch....just for a second before he looks away again.

I turn back to the counter, and start picking through the jewelry. There’s a necklace with tiny blue stones my mum would love, a ring that looks like something Alyssa would never take off. I gather them both and a few other things.

When Jax joins me, his arms are full...small paper bags of herbs and a few dark glass bottles of oils. He gives me this half-shrug, like ‘don’t ask’, and sets them down beside my picks.

Albert picks up one of the oils Jax chose, turns it in his hand, then gestures vaguely toward Jax’s face.

“This one’s also good for bruises,” he says lightly. “Couple days of this, you’d think they were never there.”

He rings us up, then pauses as he’s wrapping everything. “Tell you what,” he says, eyes glinting behind his glasses, “....you both pick one thing each. My treat, since Janice seems to have taken a shine on you.”

I blink, caught off guard. “Oh, that’s not necessary—”

He waves me off, already grinning. “Go on. Pick something nice. Something for those special girls waiting back home.” His tone’s teasing, good-natured.

A laugh slips out of me before I can stop it. “Actually,” I say, glancing toward Jax, “...there’s no one waiting.”

Albert raises a brow, amused.

I gesture between us. “We’re together. He's my boyfriend.”

Jax doesn’t say anything, just meets Albert’s gaze for a heartbeat with that calm unreadable expression of his.

Albert’s smile softens even more. “Well then,” he says, nodding once, “...pick something you’ll each like.” He gestures toward a low shelf near the back. “Try over there, there’s bound to be something you’ll like.”

Jax and I exchange a wordless look, then head in that direction. The section’s definitely curated with a masculine edge... darker metals, clean lines, minimal fuss.

My eyes snag on a bracelet...thin, matte silver with a subtle twist along the band. It’s simple and understated but still really cool. I pick one up, weigh it in my palm. “What about this?”

Jax's gaze flicks from the bracelet to me. He hums low in his throat, then nods once. “Yeah, it's nice.” he says, voice rough around the edges. He picks up another just like it, runs his thumb along the metal, then clears his throat. “These should do.”

I can’t help the small smile that tugs at my mouth at how slightly flustered he seems.

We make our way back to the counter, bracelets in hand, but Albert’s got his phone pressed to his ear now. His expression’s tight, brow furrowed. “No, listen, just let it be,” he says, his voice edged with restrained frustration. “I’ll handle it myself.” He waits a beat, exhales, then ends the call with a heavy sigh.

“Everything okay?” I ask.

He looks up, startled for a moment, then waves a hand. “Yeah, yeah. Fine.” Another sigh. “Just....hard to find good help these days.”

“Help with what?”

“The farm,” he says, leaning one hand on the counter. “My leg’s been acting up again. Doctor says I should take it easy, but I can’t exactly let the place run itself.” He shakes his head, a wry smile tugging at his mouth. “I’ve gone through three guys already. Just half an acre to manage, a few animals. Nothing crazy, but apparently it’s too much to ask that someone remembers to feed the animals before noon, or not drown the seedlings with a damn hose.”

I bite back a laugh, but he’s not entirely joking.

He exhales again, softer this time, and shrugs. “Ah, well. Maybe it’s a sign I should slow down even more. Let the weeds win for once.”

There’s something in the way he says it...half humor, half weary surrender.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I tell him quietly.

He waves it off like it’s nothing, but the gesture’s too quick. The worry lingers anyway, soft but heavy around his mouth and in the tired slope of his shoulders.

“Back when we bought the place,” he starts, voice warming with memory, “...we planted the whole two acres. Supplied fresh produce to two nearby schools and a hospital.” He nods toward the framed photo. “It was just me, Janice, and our son, Jason. A few farmhands now and then, but only when the work piled up.”

His thumb traces the photo’s edge. “Then Jason got married, moved away. And Janice had a bit of a health scare. Nothing too bad, thank the Lord, but it was enough to make us slow down. Cut the farming to half an acre. We sell at the farmer’s market now.... keeps us busy.”

He catches himself mid-sentence, chuckles softly. “Ah, listen to me rambling on. You boys probably have better places to be.”

I start to tell him we actually don’t, but Jax speaks first. His voice comes out low and deep, a touch uneven, like it’s feeling its way through the words. “Where’s the farm located?”

Albert blinks, caught off guard. “Duvall,” he says after a moment. “Near the Tolt River. About an hour east of here.”

I turn toward Jax instinctively. He’s gone still, jaw tight, gaze far away.... like something’s tugged at a quiet place inside him. When he feels me looking, he turns, meets my eyes for a heartbeat that feels longer than it should. Then he looks back to Albert.

“I can help,” he says simply.

Albert raises an eyebrow. “You ever worked on a farm before? It’s not easy work if you’re not used to it.”

Jax shakes his head once. “No,” he says, voice steady but low. “But I pick things up quick. And I don’t shy away from hard work.”

There’s truth there, shaped from something lived.

Albert studies him for a moment longer, then chuckles. “You look capable, I’ll give you that.” He leans back, still smiling. “Give me your number, son. I’ll be in touch.”

Albert hands Jax his phone to put his number in. Says he’ll give him a call tomorrow, see if it’s something Jax would be up for.

I watch Jax take the phone, his fingers moving over the screen with that calm focus of his. I try not to smile....and fail. I also try not to get ahead of myself, to remind myself this doesn’t have to mean anything. But the quiet part of me, the one that still believes in strange timing and small signs, won’t quite listen.