Losing Control : His Madness, His Cure Chapter 209

I’m on him before I even realize I’ve moved....arms locking around him, breath catching against his shoulder. “You can’t take it back now,” I murmur into his neck, my voice shaky but smiling. “You said yes.”

Jax huffs out a small laugh against my ear, his arms tightening around me. “I won’t.”

I lean back just enough to see him, my hands finding his face, palms warm against his jaw. I’m smiling so wide it almost hurts, like my chest can’t hold the size of it. It’s the kind of joy that feels alive, reckless and uncontainable. The kind that makes everything else go quiet.

I press a quick kiss to his lips, still grinning against his mouth, and when I pull back, he’s just staring at me like he can't understand my happiness. I laugh, breathless and bright. “I’ve never been this excited to go home.”

His brow arches, a flicker of amusement breaking through that steady heaviness he's wearing. “You’re really that happy?”

“Yeah,” I whisper, still smiling. “I really am.”

Something in his face softens. The tension that’s been living there drains out, and the smile that follows is real this time. Unfiltered. His eyes catch mine, and he mutters, almost wryly, “At least something good’s coming out of my impending misery.”

“You’ll survive. It might even be fun.”

“Doubt it,” he says, but there’s no bite to it. Just warmth.

I keep smiling anyway, but it shifts, something quieter and heavier settles behind it. I hold his gaze, let him see it. The part of me that’s grateful and terrified and in love, all tangled together. “Thanks,” I say softly.

He dips his chin in a small nod, the kind that says more than words ever could. “Anything for you,” he murmurs, and it lands somewhere I can’t quite name.

“Not just for saying yes,” I add, my voice rougher now. “For the other thing, too. Deciding not to go back there.”

He swallows, eyes flicking away for a second before finding mine again. “Like I just said....” he breathes out, the corner of his mouth twitching. “Anything for you. For real this time.”

And it hits me how much that means coming from him. How much it costs.

He eventually leaves for his apartment to pack and grab his passport after we confirm there's extra seats...turns out there's plenty. I even change mine so we can sit next to each other. Before he leaves, he tosses a look over his shoulder and says, “You should drop the smile before your face gets stuck like that.”

I just shake my head. “Not possible.”

It’s a stupid kind of joy, light and impossible to contain....like I’ve swallowed the sun and it doesn’t know how to stay quiet. Jax. Coming home with me. That’s huge. Bigger than I can explain, and it makes me love him even more, if that’s even something I can still measure.

I figured he’d be gone a while, but he comes back faster than I expect. Freshly showered, clean clothes clinging to his frame, a duffel slung over his shoulder. He drops it by my station, then drags a chair over and sits beside me.

Layla has a client, so the only sound is the buzz of her machine filling the room. I flip open my sketchbook, start a new page, and begin sketching Jax’s profile, exactly how he is right then.

“Stay still,” I murmur.

He doesn’t.

After a while, he asks. “You gonna tell your family I’m going with you?”

I shake my head, still shading the line of his jaw. “Apart from my dad, no one even knows I’m going. It’s supposed to be a surprise for my mum.”

He frowns, eyes narrowed. “Surprise?”

“Yeah,” I confirm, smiling to myself. “Apparently she’s gone full hurricane mode lately, completely possessed over this exhibition. Seeing me will allegedly calm her down.”

That familiar flicker of suspicion cuts through Jax's expression. “So we’re just gonna show up? Out of the blue?”

I chuckle under my breath. “That’s the idea.”

He hums, low and doubtful, but doesn’t push it. I pause my sketching anyway, glance sideways at him. “You nervous?”

He doesn’t answer immediately, just sits there, tapping a finger against his thigh. Then finally, he exhales. “I’m not even sure what I’m setting myself up for here.”

I go back to sketching, pretending I’m not watching the small shifts in his face, the tension in his jaw. “They’ll love you,” I say easily.

“Yeah, right.”

I set the pencil down again, turning fully toward him. “I’m serious, Jax. All they want is for me to be happy. And since you make me extremely happy”...my voice drops, “....they’ll love you.”

I reach out, tap the tip of his nose with my pencil. “Don’t start overthinking it. You don’t have to act a certain way, or say the right thing. No pressure.”

He rolls his eyes, but I catch the faintest curve of a smirk tugging at his mouth.

“I’ll be there,” I remind him softly. “To make sure no one’s mean to you.”

That earns me a light scoff, more amused than anything. I reach out, slide my hand into his hair, and turn his face back toward the light. “Now stay fucking still, yeah?”

He mutters something under his breath but obeys, and for the next few minutes, I just draw....the lines of his jaw, the slope of his nose, the small, almost-hidden twitch at the corner of his lips when he’s trying not to smile.

Our flight’s set for eight. We decide to get there an hour early, but time moves differently tonight...faster. It slips through my fingers before I even notice, and the next thing I know, we’re in the backseat of a cab heading to the airport, city lights flickering by us.

He’s got my hand in his, thumb dragging idle patterns over my knuckles. It’s a small thing, but we’ve never been good at not touching.

Apart from Jax, I’ve never told my family about anyone. Not a name, not a story. I love them to death, but there was always a part of me I kept tucked away.

Until Jax

Now I’m sitting here, hand in his, on my way to introduce him to the people who built my world. And it feels huge. Sacred, even. Like I’m giving them a piece of something I never thought I’d ever get the chance to have. And this, him, feels like a point of no return. I already knew there was no going back from what we have. But this just seals it.