Logan Chapter 132

-Logan-

I lay back on the bed, still panting, and pull Emory so that her head is on my chest. I’ve gotten used to her falling directly to sleep from the intensity of her orgasms by now, and I have finally managed to keep her from pulling me with her through our link. When I let it happen, it’s absolutely obliterating in the best way, but my wolf hates it when I leave us both vulnerable like that, even in our own home. I’m glad I have this time alone in wakefulness, because I have to take a moment to think about what we just did. I’ve been fine with getting a little rough with Emory. I love pushing her boundaries just a bit, showing her things that she had no idea she would love.

This is the first time that she’s been the one pushing me, rather than the other way around. I hate that it took her thinking she was dreaming for her to feel like she could tell me what she wanted, but when she dropped her inhibitions and demanded that I give her what she needed… I don’t know that I’ve ever seen anything hotter in my entire fucking life. I almost want to get her riled up like that more often just to see if I can get her to jump me with that kind of intensity.

I really should be working with her on trying to find her wolf and shift, but I just can’t bear to separate our skin after that kind of encounter. I text the ladies in the kitchen to postpone dinner for a bit while Emory and I get our snuggles in. Surely a half hour of cuddling before we buckle down won’t harm anything.

When we finally wake up it’s two hours later. The cooks texted me that they left a roast in the oven to stay warm because they were going home for the night, and now Emory and I are wide awake just before we would normally go to bed. I guess the cover of night will suit our purposes that much better. Emory woke up just a few seconds before I did, and her shifting to try and go to the bathroom without waking me is what pulled me out of my doze. We both stretch, cataloging our aches and pains from the physical stresses of our love making. Emory would’ve been sore anyway from running earlier in the day, and she spends a minute being mad at herself for making it worse. I have long scratch marks down my back and across my ribcage that I plan to wear with pride.

When Emory sees them, she finally breaks the companionable silence between us. “Holy shit, Logan, I’m so sorry. Why would you let me do that to you?” Her face is bright red with embarrassment and dismay.

“Shh, wildcat. They’ll last a couple of hours, tops. They don’t even hurt. It’s hot that you were so desperate for me that you’d sink your little claws in to find purchase. Stop worrying about it and get ready. We’ve got a wolf to meet.” That’s enough to get her mind working on another topic. Emory can’t decide if she’s excited or terrified to meet the wolf that would be on the other side of her shift. She’s seen how I’ve worked with mine, how we can have the same goals but differing opinions, and she’s worried that she’ll be stuck with a wolf that’s too different from her for them to get along. She didn’t grow up with her wolf like I did mine, so what if they have clashing perspectives?

Emory also worries that she won’t have an inner wolf at all and will have to learn how to work and move a wolf’s body with all the wrong instincts. How is she supposed to keep track of running on four legs when she’s used to two? The only thing worse than that eventuality is that she doesn’t transform into an actual wolf at all, but some kind of horror movie mash-up.

I let her compile a list of all the things she’s worried about in her head before I stand up and comfort her. I’d rather she didn’t worry about things that could happen at all, but she always feels worse if I don’t let her think through the possibilities before we start on something new. She’d rather know the worst case scenario and prepare herself mentally for it than go into anything blind. I feel like it’s a lot of extra angst in situations where she can’t change the future either way, but I want her to feel as secure as possible.

Since Emory has been human her entire life, I don’t have any illusions that this first shift will be easy or simple. I’m not sure whether she’ll fully shift, but the changes in her when her temper spikes have me feeling optimistic. It’ll just take a little practice, and I’m happy to spend more time with my mate any day. All I have to do is try to find a way to describe a feeling I’ve taken for granted my entire life. Shouldn’t be too hard.