Logan Chapter 16

-Logan-

I have to admit, I had one second of panic where I thought I might actually have fucked Emory to death. I’ve never had a woman pass out on me like that. But she almost immediately stirred, and I realized that I was being an idiot because I can still feel her pulse against my cheek. She pulls in a deep breath before this beautiful little smile curves her lips. She looks like the cat that got into the cream - my cream, I think to myself childishly- and I think it’s my favorite of her smiles so far. I’m feeling pretty smug myself, underneath the feeling of absolute lassitude. All my joints and muscles feel only loosely tethered, like I’ve been tense my whole life and just got a full body massage. I plant a couple of kisses on the claiming mark I left on her- oops- because I can’t do anything else.

“How are you doing, Emory? Still alive?” I joke as I ease my cock out of her. I flinch a little at how sensitive I am, but I stop caring as I take a moment to watch my come leak out of her. I shake off the hypnosis as she realizes what the feeling is.

“Oh my God, we forgot a condom. I’ve never done this, not once. I can’t believe-”

“Emory! Just take a breath. I’m clean. It sounds like you’re clean. I can get tested if it would make you feel more comfortable, but I’ve never had sex without a condom either. We should be just fine on that front.” I’m surprised I forgot a condom too, but I know the blame belongs squarely on my wolf. He took more control than he has ever cared to before, but I should’ve realized that’s how it would be with my mate. Of course my wolf wants her marked and pregnant as soon as possible. He’s already got the claiming mark on her, which I will have to talk to her about, but we have to go at her pace with everything else. She has no idea what that mark means and I’m going to have to tell her everything soon. Much sooner, now.

I get an oily feeling under my skin as I think about all she doesn’t know about me. She thinks I’m human. She doesn’t even realize anything else is a possibility. James might have had a point about full disclosure…

“Okay, so we’re both clean, that’s a relief, and I’m on birth control. We should be okay. We’re okay. But I really would feel more comfortable if we used a condom from here on out- nothing is a hundred percent effective, and I’d really prefer to have both.” Her lowering tension loosens a couple of the sudden knots in my shoulders as well.

“Of course, Emory, whatever you’re comfortable with. I can’t even believe I got carried away like that.” I rub the back of my neck in embarrassment. I’ve been behaving like a maniac with her, and she’s been taking everything in stride. I’m grateful, of course, but I’m not sure how much of it is the mating hormones and how much of it is her. She doesn’t seem the type to fly off the handle either way, but surely nobody is this calm…. Or, if she is, could it be time to tell her the truth?

I wish there was some kind of manual for this, or that I had fleshed the plan out more with Derek before we clicked off. I could have just texted him and got clarification on his vision literally any time between then and now. I didn’t, of course. I’ve been winging it with Emory, trying to ease her into the knowledge of my people without sounding like a psycho or actively lying to her… too much. It’s just such a basic instinct to stay secret, a mandate beaten into us from the first time we shift, and that habit is battling with the instinct to be completely open and transparent with my mate. She’s my mate. Of course I should tell her everything, but the question has always been when to tell her.

I’m almost starting to sweat, trying to figure out the way to go. Do I let her know that sexually transmitted diseases won’t be a thing for us because I just happen to be a werewolf? Or do I give it the gravity it deserves? I try it out in my head- “Darling rose, I have something to tell you. You won’t believe me at first, but have you seen-” no. That’s not the way to go. She did say she reads, and shifter fiction has been popular lately- maybe that’s the direction to go? “Baby, you don’t know it yet, but I’m exactly your fetish.” Gross. Not that, either.

I pull out of my silent nightmare only to realize she’s been talking to me. She looks like she’s waiting for me to jump out the window, and I can’t blame her.