Logan Chapter 70

-Emory-

I find myself awake before Logan, again. When he sleeps, he sleeps hard. I check the clock and see that it’s just after 5 A.M. Great. It took forever to get to sleep, even after Logan “helped” me relax. I’ve only gotten a few hours, but I don’t feel like I’ll be able to get back to sleep. I’ve had so much change and upheaval in such a short time, and tomorrow I’m going to have to explain a whirlwind romance to my parents. I already know my dad will not be amused. I shouldn’t get ahead of myself, though. Before we even deal with my family- can’t forget that Bryan and Hunter will also be insufferable- I’m sitting in on mediation with Logan for the pack members this evening. At least I have a little bit of guidance on what to wear, which also hints at how I should be acting.

The way that Logan tends to act with the pack members I’ve met so far seems to be your classic stern authority figure. He’s much more relaxed and playful with me and with the guys than he’s been with anyone else we’ve run into. I’m not sure I could pull that off even if I was a shifter as well. I’ll have to take a softer approach, which is what I’ve been doing instinctively, anyway. I caught a look from Logan last night that implied his approval of how I’ve been doing so far. Alpha and Luna are starting to seem like very parental roles in themselves. I guess that means he’ll be good with our kids…

Whoa. It’s a little early to be thinking about things like that. I shake my head as hard as I dare, so that I don’t alert Logan to my wall staring. It’s actually nice to have this time to myself so I can just think through everything. We’ll have to discuss how many kids we want and when. That will only matter after we take care of all our other issues. Cora has been suspiciously quiet the last few days. My family is going to be rioting through the pack tomorrow. I’ll be introducing them to a pack that I’ll have only met some of, as of the end of today. I hope Logan won’t expect me to make decisions in the mediation today. I won’t know any of the context for the issues brought forth. At least I already know what to expect from Anna today, even if those expectations are low. I wonder to myself if that covers everything. Everything except the supposed changes I’ll be going through with the full moon ceremony that I’m still not super comfortable thinking about.

Logan sighs next to me. “I can hear your brain whirring. We can only control our actions, little rose. We can’t fix anything just by worrying about it.” He rubs one hand up and down my side before pulling me back into his chest. “I could take your mind off of it, but that’s a temporary fix. Trust me to take care of you, and let the rest happen as it was going to, anyway. We’ve got about thirty more minutes before we need to be up.” He kisses my hair and squeezes me one more time.

“How do you do that? You have so much responsibility- how do you just switch off to sleep?” He rubs his face as I turn my head to look at him.

“It took awhile, but I learned that I don’t think as well without being rested. The pack and company both deserve the best I can offer, and being tired or stressed just makes everything harder to deal with. There are times where something comes up in the middle of the night, but not often. I just compartmentalize. It’s a skill you’ll be able to pick up in no time.” I trace circles on his chest while I think through that. People are depending on us, and they deserve me to be rested and clear-headed for them. That makes sense. I finally manage to get a few more minutes of sleep, and I actually feel better for it.

I dress carefully for the day. I want to look professional, but still accessible. It’s a hard line to ride, and I finally choose a dark teal wraparound dress that I can make more or less casual with accessories. I pair it with some of my classier nude heels and pearls, as well as makeup that’s as glam as I can get in a professional setting. I go with a natural lip for the morning, but I bring the red that Cora always told me didn’t work with my coloring for the evening. There’s something about looking great that feels like armor. The compliments that come along with my breakfast only add to the feeling. I can take on anything today.

The driver- Silverson, I’ve learned- takes a wrong turn on the way to Logan’s office, and I’m sharply reminded that there are some things I’m still out of my depth on. Was he accounting for traffic, or are we being followed again? I don’t want to ask, in case the answers are worse than what I’m imagining. We at least know that Landon and a couple of other pack members have been rotating on Cora duty. I’m not sure what she’s capable of anymore, and having her follow us would have the additional pain of betrayal behind it. We finally park in the garage beneath Úlfur Industries and I take a deep breath before stepping into the elevator, determined to put my mental armor back on.

I can’t even feel bad about dropping my resolution to take the stairs and walk to work. Logan was apparently running every morning in wolf form and jogging into work before we met, but we’re both adjusting to the other’s schedule. It’ll take a minute before we learn to account for the other’s routine when making plans. We walked in a few minutes late yesterday, and today we’re on time, so I’ll take the progress. Besides, I lost so much weight when Logan and I were broken up that I don’t need the extra exercise anyway. If I can just maintain where I am now, I’ll be set to work on something else next year.

Confidence, confidence, confidence, I’m thinking to myself, as I follow Logan to his office. As we pass through the seating area, Anna cuts me off and shuts the door behind the two of them. I take a deep breath and sit on the couch to resign myself to a day of boredom and catty bickering. Excellent. Only eight hours to go. I can only hope that Logan doesn’t say anything to Anna like I asked.