Fell In Love With My Roomy Chapter 110

"You and Piper were in a weird situation where you got drunk and fooled around."

He keeps repeating, "I've never actually slept with her," as if that's the part driving me insane.

I shake my head and ask, "So?" "The specifics of this contribute to maybe 15% of my anger," I almost whisper due to my exhaustion. "What upsets me is that you, once again, concealed something from me, hoping I wouldn't discover it."

"When the heck have I ever not told you something?"

"Where do I even start? I was oblivious to your family until I was at their house. Your sister remains an enigma, and the only topic you've been entirely truthful about is that football injury! Kent, I'm an attentive listener, but relationships require honesty from both sides. You said you were going to work on opening up."

"I'm working on it," I state as he presses me, but he remains unconvinced.

"I didn't want to learn like that," I whisper. "After you shared such a significant piece of information, you just fell asleep. Whether you like it or not, you did get involved with Piper. I don't want to know how much, but it's one of the things that complicates dating you.

I know the instant I say it that it's too harsh, even if I believe he needs to hear it. He looks utterly devastated upon hearing it, and I bite my lip.

"Wow," he murmurs with a sigh as he gazes at his feet.

I mumble and shake my head, "And I don't want you to feel guilty." "When we weren't together, there were no rules about who you could see or what you could do." I pause to think of what to say next. "But it makes me feel awful inside, and the fact that you turned to her so quickly bothers me."

"I don't know what else I can do to fix this," he says. He sighs, and I do too. I didn't sleep well, I had too much to drink, and I'm feeling down. We can't resolve this right away.

"It would have helped if you'd just been honest with me," I tell him as I pull a sweater from my bag. "Kent, I'm tired of always being the last to know."

"So what? You want me to start blurting out everything I think like you?" he asks, and I flinch because that comment makes me feel attacked. I also take socks from my bag, trying not to cry as I put them on. Then I put on my shoes and return to my suitcase to zip it up.

"I think you know that's excessive," I snap at him as I walk past him into the bathroom to pick up my dress, which has fallen on the floor.

He asks, "So what are you going to do? I'm not a fragile being all the time." I push past him and put the dress and its heels in my bag. I look around the room, but I can't find anything else I might have forgotten. My wallet and phone are in my purse, which is on the desk next to my suitcase.

I cross my arms and ask Kent, "How long have we known each other?" He raises his eyebrows.

"Over four months."

"Right, and how did you feel about me when I moved in?"

"I liked you," he admits.

I continue, "Then how did you treat me for weeks?" He sighs and looks up at the ceiling. He merely chews on the inside of his cheek and replies, "Like you hated me and couldn't stand to be around me." "Remember our first kiss?"

"I couldn't forget it."

"That's not the same as denying it ever happened and telling me not to mention it to anyone," I retort. "What about on Halloween, which was the cursed night in question? Did you have something to tell me then?"

He sighs. "No."

"That's right, you instructed me to talk to Dane instead," I state with a shrug. "How about when I met your mom? Did you tell her the truth about who I was?"

He huffs, "No." "Listen, Juls, I don't want to be accused of being a deceitful liar. If that's all you think I am, and all I've ever been to you, then go."

I snap, "You know I don't think that," and grab my winter coat. "I love being with you, Kent. You're fun and exciting, and you make me feel like a new person. But I don't want our fun and happiness to compensate for the emotional distance between us."

"Jesus Christ, Juls! We're both 21, and we've only been dating for a month. What more do you want from me?" he asks, clearly frustrated. "I'm giving you everything I have, I'd do anything to make you happy, and yet you insist that I should be capable of more. You think I'm a terrible person because I won't burden you with things that would only make you sad."

I yell, "I never said that!" "Kent, being in a relationship means facing challenges together," I murmur as tears start to well up in my eyes. I managed to hold them back for a long time, but now they're flowing. "It means trusting each other and being honest about how we feel. It's not just about extravagant trips to New York, always being happy, and intimacy."

I sneeze and try not to reveal how I feel, but my mind is in turmoil. I'm tired, and I'm not even sure why we're still fighting.

"You're great at being there for me, and you make me feel so much better when things get tough. But I never get the chance to do that for you because you keep everything to yourself until it becomes an overwhelming flood. What you said last night upset me, but not as much as you trying to turn it around on me and make me feel guilty this morning."

I sigh, zip up my coat, and gather my things. I didn't want to leave, but I can't stay here because if I do, I'll forget about him too quickly, and we'll be right back where we started.

"Maybe...maybe this is too much too soon," I mumble as tears start streaming down my face. He looks up at me.

"No, Juls, come on!"

I tell him in a whisper, "I'm going to take the train home to Providence." He rushes over to me.

"Don't go, baby," he pleads, holding my shoulders. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm so sorry." Being this close to him makes me cry even more.

I whisper, "I think...I think we should take a break until I return at the end of January." "Give us time to sort out our feelings."

"My feelings don't need sorting, Juls. You're the one and only, and you know there's no one else," he implores, and I nod quietly. "Stay here."

I whisper, "You just told me to." "So I think I will. I'm not saying it's over forever, but I am saying it's time for a break. I want you to figure everything out."

"Stop talking like that," he pleads, touching my face. I sigh and shake my head.

I whisper, "I have to go," as I lean in to kiss his unshaven cheek. "Kent, you know how I feel about you," I whisper as I step back and grab my suitcase. "But right now, we're a mess. I'm tired of fighting and crying and feeling like I don't know you. That's not healthy, and it can't compensate for all the good things in our relationship."

He pleads, "Don't do this. Don't go away for a month while we're not together." "Don't go, sweetheart! What can I do?"

I tell him, "You can be honest next time," and I squeeze his hand with my other hand. "I'm not sure if this is the best choice, but it's the right one. I'll see you in a month." I let him go and start to walk toward the door with tears streaming down my face.

I have a feeling that Kent won't be sad for long. He'll go out tonight and meet someone new. He'll also hook up with other girls, which is what he does when he's feeling really good. Things will be different when I return in a month, and I'll be fortunate if we're still friends. But I have to do this for myself because the fights we have every few weeks aren't good for either of us.

They don't make me feel good.

I'm done with guys taking advantage of me. Dane lied to me, and look where that got me. Kent meant more to me than him, but I won't make the same mistake twice by letting a guy use extravagance to mask how little I know.

The hardest thing I've ever had to do is close the door to my room. The train ride back is also very tough. As I rest my cheek on the glass, I know why it's hurting so much.

I love Kent.