The Biker's Fate Chapter 449

The next morning, I awoke to discover a voicemail from Natalie. I couldn't believe I'd slept through my phone ringing, but I'd drunk enough to make me forget for a little while, so that meant I'd drunk enough to sleep through the rest of the night without waking.

"Hi, honey. Michelle is headed to Shady Pines Funeral home. If you and Kennedy want to meet me there at four this afternoon, you can spend some time with her before they get her ready for cremation. If you can't make it, that's absolutely okay. Just let me know."

She hung up and I flopped back onto the bed.

"Bad news?" Merrick asked as he pulled me over his chest.

"Kennedy and I can go down to the funeral home at four. She's going to be cremated, but Michelle always wanted to donate."

"She might not qualify now if her heart's destroyed."

"True."

"Mom wanted to do the same thing, but she kind of blew her head off. They didn't get to her fast enough, so…"

"Oh, god," I whispered, hugging him tight.

"She was far too damaged, so Dad had her cremated as well."

"I'm so sorry you had to deal with that."

"Yeah, it fucking sucked."

"I don't doubt it." I kissed him just over his Dogs of Fire tattoo. "I love you."

"Love you back."

"You don't need to come with me today. Kennedy and I can go."

"You seriously think you're going anywhere alone right now?"

"No. I just wanted to give you an out."

"I don't want a fucking out," he ground out. "I'm driving you."

I nodded against his chest. "Thanks, honey."

"You're welcome." He gave me a gentle squeeze. "How are you feeling?"

"Not bad, surprisingly." I smiled up at him. "The water and ibuprofen helped."

"Good," he said.

It hadn't been lost on me that Merrick had watched me like a hawk as I drank one amaretto sour after another, then foregoing the sour, making sure I drank water in between each new beverage. He'd virtually carried me up to his room before making sure I took ibuprofen before we fell into bed. He'd tended to both my physical and emotional needs, as I was realizing he always did.

"You always take care of me," I whispered.

He kissed my temple. "I was serious when I said I'm in service of the queen."

"I'm letting that sink in, honey."

"Fuckin' finally," he breathed out.

I rolled my eyes even as I snuggled closer.

"You hungry?"

"Starved," I admitted.

"Want your man to make you breakfast?"

"Is bacon on the table?"

"Bacon's always on the table," he said.

"Then, yes, I'd like my man to make me breakfast."

He kissed me gently, then slid out of bed and pulled on his jeans and a T-shirt.

I gripped Merrick's hand as we walked into the funeral home. Kennedy walked with us, her shoulders drooped, her defeated countenance so unlike her normal self. She refused to let Mouse come with her, making it clear (again) he was a one-night stand and it would never be more than that. I had to give it to Mouse, he took it like a man and didn't seem to let her rejection faze him.

We were met by Mr. Lamb, who was an older man, balding and thin, with a calm and gentle demeanor. "I am so sorry for your loss."

"Thank you," I said.

"Michelle's parents are with her now. Will you follow me?"

I nodded, and Kennedy led the way, following Mr. Lamb.

"Whatever you need, Rem," Merrick whispered as we were ushered to where Michelle was waiting.

Natalie sat between her husband, Don, and son, Gabriel, and turned with a sad smile as Kennedy and I walked in. I hadn't seen Michelle's dad, Don, in ages, but now he sat with his arm tight around Natalie and he looked wrecked. Understandably. Michelle was their only daughter and she'd always been a daddy's girl.

Gabe and I were friends. Not like Michelle and I were friends, but he and his sister were close, so he was often at the same parties, bars, clubs, and get-togethers we frequented. If he'd had a vagina, he would have been the fourth in our group.

We made our way to them and they stood and hugged us tight, Gabe holding me a little longer than the rest, then they hung back and I walked with Kennedy up the three stairs to where Michelle was lying in a very simple but elegant casket.

Kennedy took my hand and squeezed, then reached in and fixed Michelle's collar. "She has to look her best."

"Very true," I agreed as tears poured down my face.

Michelle used to joke that she wanted no hair out of place, even when she started losing it. She'd made the decision to shave her head the second her hair started falling out. I stroked her cheek, her skin so pale and soft it felt as thin as paper, but even in death she was beautiful.

All such a waste.

Strong arms wrapped around me from behind as I crumpled, and Merrick carried me to a row of chairs next to Gabe, settling me on his lap as he sat down. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to stop crying, because I was a friend who had lost a friend, but Don and Natalie had lost their child. But I couldn't get a grip on my emotions and I sobbed uncontrollably into Merrick's neck.

It was real…all way too real. My best friend was dead. There was no way to bring her back and I was instantly lost.

"It's okay, honey," Natalie crooned, rubbing my back. "Let it out."

"I'm so…sorry…Natalie. I didn't…want to cry."

"Oh, baby, it's okay to cry."

"But she was your daughter. It's sadder for you," I rasped.

"Sweetness, I know how y'all feel about each other. You were…are sisters. It's sad, so be sad. Your pain is no less real than mine. It's okay."

I nodded into Merrick's chest, letting the sadness swamp me. Kennedy sat beside Natalie and they held each other as Michelle's dad left the room. He was a stoic man, so that didn't surprise me, but it did make me cry a little harder.

Merrick stroked my hair and pulled me closer as I wept into his shirt. I couldn't seem to stop, the loss so intense, the pain so visceral. I didn't know what I was going to do without her. I didn't know what the world was going to do without her.

I don't know how long we sat there, him holding me, Natalie and Kennedy holding each other, but the lights in the room came on, so I figured it was probably getting dark outside.

I'd stopped crying, but continued to burrow into the warmth and safety of Merrick's body. Mr. Lamb cleared his throat and Natalie nodded, rising to her feet. "We should go. You can both come back tomorrow if you like. She'll be cremated on Monday, then we'll work on a memorial service."