Luna. Chapter 69

(Kael's POV)

The surgery went well. Five hours of lying on an operating table while doctors extracted bone marrow from my hip, but worth every second when Dr. Martinez told us the transplant had been successful.

Now I was sitting in the recovery room at Iron Claw medical facility, watching Asher sleep while Lyra dozed in the chair beside his bed. The painkillers were wearing off, and my hip felt like someone had driven railroad spikes through it, but I'd never been happier to be in pain.

My son was going to be okay.

Adrian appeared in the doorway, moving quietly so he wouldn't wake Lyra.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Like I got hit by a truck. But good."

"The doctors say Asher's body is accepting the transplant well."

"And Seraphina?"

"Still in the wind. But we have leads."

I thought about the woman who'd systematically tried to destroy my family. Who'd poisoned a four-year-old child to get back at me.

"I want to be part of the hunt."

"You just had major surgery."

"I can hunt from a hospital bed if I have to."

"Kael, you need to focus on recovering. And on your family."

I looked at Lyra sleeping in the uncomfortable hospital chair, her hand resting protectively on Asher's arm even in sleep.

"I've been focused on protecting them for four years. Look where it got us."

"You saved Victor's life."

"And nearly lost my son's in the process."

"That's not your fault."

"Isn't it? Seraphina is obsessed with me. She's targeting my family because of choices I made."

"She's targeting your family because she's unhinged. That's not on you."

Maybe Adrian was right. Maybe I'd been carrying guilt that didn't belong to me. But looking at my son hooked up to monitoring equipment, knowing someone had deliberately poisoned him...

"I should have killed her years ago," I said quietly.

"Probably. But you're not a killer, Kael. That's what makes you a good Alpha."

"Good Alphas protect their families."

"You are protecting your family. You literally gave part of yourself to save your son's life."

"After someone tried to murder him because of me."

"Are you planning to take responsibility for every horrible thing that happens to people you love?"

I thought about that. About Victor's poisoning, which had started before I was even involved with the Ashwalkers. About Lyra's pregnancy loss, which Seraphina had orchestrated before I knew she was alive. About Asher's poisoning, which had happened while I was trying to track down the people responsible for our previous trauma.

"Maybe I can't prevent everything," I admitted.

"You can't prevent anything. You can only respond to what happens and try to minimize damage."

"Is that what I've been doing? Minimizing damage?"

"You've been sacrificing yourself to protect other people. There's a difference."

Lyra stirred in her chair, opening her eyes slowly. When she saw me awake, she smiled.

"How are you feeling?"

"Sore but functional. How's he doing?"

"Blood pressure is stabilizing. The doctors are cautiously optimistic."

"And you? How are you doing?"

"Terrified. Grateful. Angry." She stretched, wincing at the stiffness in her neck. "Mostly angry."

"At me?"

"At Seraphina. At the situation. At myself for not seeing this coming."

"None of us saw this coming."

"You did. You've been preparing for threats against our family for years."

"I prepared for the wrong threats."

"Maybe. But you were still there when we needed you."

The simple acknowledgment meant more than she probably realized. For four years, I'd wondered if my sacrifices had been worth anything. If the pain I'd caused had accomplished anything beyond destroying the best thing in my life.

"Lyra, about what I promised. About telling you everything."

"After Asher recovers."

"No, now. While he's sleeping and we have time."

She looked at me for a long moment, then nodded. "Okay. Tell me everything."

So I did. I told her about the first contact from the Ashwalkers, the evidence they'd shown me of Victor's poisoning, the impossible choice they'd given me. I told her about the years of pretending to be their agent while feeding information to Adrian and the Council. I told her about the marking ceremony that had left the scar on my face and others on my body. I told her about the women I'd had to seduce for information, the people I'd had to betray to maintain my cover, the lines I'd crossed to keep my family safe.

When I finished, Lyra was quiet for a long time.

"I understand why you didn't tell me," she said finally.

"Do you?"

"I would have tried to stop you. And I wouldn't have been strong enough to live with the consequences of Victor's death."

"I should have trusted you to be stronger than that."

"Maybe. Or maybe you made the only choice you could with the information you had."

"Do you forgive me for keeping secrets?"

"I forgive you for everything," she said quietly. "But forgiveness doesn't fix everything that's broken."

I knew she was right. Some damage couldn't be undone with explanations or apologies. Some choices left scars that never fully healed.

But looking at our son sleeping peacefully, his color already better than it had been in weeks, I thought maybe some things were worth the scars.