Her CEO Stalker and Her Second Chance Mate Chapter 118

Briar

I sat like that for a long time. My back against the door, my knees pulled to my chest. The scent of Uncle Jake’s old leather jacket, my only comfort as I let the mask of anger fall away and allowed myself to cry, to feel the loss, to grieve. The insurmountable ache in my chest was a chasm so deep in my chest that the bloom in my chest ached along with me like a loud echo roaring in my soul. It mirrored all my lost desires down to my core. My lifeline was gone and without it I didn’t know if I could carry on. I cried into the leather over my forearms, willing the weight of the jacket to cling to me like a hug across the veil of the dead to comfort me. 

The sound of a vehicle approaching startled me from my tears and survival mode kicked in. I got to my feet wiping the tears from my eyes and had Ole Betty loaded and against my shoulder as I watched through the peep hole. Mazzie’s car pulled up. Lana hopped out a moment later laden with bags of take out and what looked like bags filled with ice cream and alcohol. My heart lightened a fraction, and new tears formed as my shoulders sagged and I disengaged the gun and set it next to the door. I had thought I’d be alone, that our friends would choose to support Carter. They had been his friends first, of course and maybe they were a part of the big hoax that was our undoing. Relief washed over me as Lana trudged up the porch carrying the heavy load. I opened the door and did the only thing that made sense as I threw my arms around her. The bags fell to the floor and when her arms came around me I sobbed into her rainbow and blonde hair.

“You came?” I choked as more tears fell. Mazzie peered at us from the car, most likely ensuring that I wasn’t going to turn Lana away. I mouthed her a thank you as I cherished Lana’s warmth against mine, tears still streaming down my face. She nodded before she turned the car around and made her way back up the drive.

“Of course I did,” she said as she ran her hands in soothing motions over my back. “What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t?” 

“I thought you were Carter’s friend,” I admitted as I helped her pick up the bags.

“Pfft. He’s an idiot,” she said as we walked inside. “You are both my friends but in this I don’t support him.” she added as we walked into the dark kitchen and I flipped on the light. She opened the empty fridge first and shook her head before stowing the icecream in the freezer. “Good thing I got take out,” she murmured. She snatched the bag of booze from me and put a six pack in the fridge and flaunted the tequila in front of me before she rummaged through the cupboards and came up with two coffee mugs and grinned at me. Give it to Lana to make me laugh with the irony of it, when my world had caved in on me. My expression only made her grin bigger. She nodded to the other two bags.

“Bring the food and tell me everything,” she said walking into the living room. She had remembered my preferences from the day Carter had bought the Chinese and then some. We settled into the couch, chopsticks and cartons in hand and I told her everything through bleary eyes as we stuffed our faces. I barely tasted the food but as it entered my system a trickle of relief seemed to course through me. When I finished Lana took an egg roll and slathered it in hot mustard before she spoke.

“Clyde is the biggest asshole I know and he needs Carter, If he suspected Carter had feelings for you he would have seen that as a threat to his ability to do what he does. The second Carter decides to settle down he loses his control on him.” she tried to explain. “Carter never let his feelings get involved with a job before you.” she tried to explain.

“Carter played me,” I pointed out. 

Lana sighed. “There’s a lot of things he should have told you before it got to this point, unfortunately those are his truths to tell, not mine,” she said, barring me from any more questions as I sipped on a steamy hot egg drop soup. 

I looked down at those words. What was being hidden from me. When I finally pulled away from the embrace, I apologized.

“I’m sorry I doubted you, I don’t know what’s real anymore,” I said honestly. Her small hands gripped my face which forced me to meet her eyes. Concern weighted her features as she shook her head. “Carter was Mazzie’s friend. I learned to tolerate, then like him. You're different you’re my friend. I may be friendly with the other girls on the crew but they are only friends with me because of Mazzie. You, I can tell you things I can’t tell them. You accepted my extreme dose of crazy even when I amplified it to get under Carter’s skin. When you accepted me I accepted you and who else do we have? Sure I have Mazzie, but sometimes I don’t want to trouble her when I think of dark times. I know you understand that.” New tears rolled down my cheeks and I wrapped my arms around her as I sobbed. 

So I told Lana everything that had transpired today over noodles, then ice cream.

“Clyde has done you both shitty.” she cursed pouring another round of shots.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

She sighed and closed her eyes.

“He needs Carter, you jeopardized that so he twisted things in a way to put you against him. Trust me when I say Carter was trying to protect you by letting himself take the fall.”

My mind swam with the implications of that but I wasn’t ready to let Carter off the hook. He owed me answers and there were more answers I had been too distracted to find out. I wasn’t ready to read Jake’s letter but I had boxes of his stuff that may have clues.

“I need some time to process all this but I also need to find out who my father was. Clyde knew who he was and apparently that's the only reason why he's letting me stay” I rolled my eyes. “As if I’d let anyone stop me from being precisely where Jake wanted me to be. All these secrets,to what end?” I asked, shaking my head before taking th shot.

“I don’t know. All I can tell you is that Jake was the best of men and that Carter was like a son to him. Why he didn’t tell Carter who he left it all too I can’t fathom to understand.” She said getting up and coming back with the six pack.

“All I can say is that Carter had his reasons and I don’t know if I were him if I would have done this any better.” She popped open two beers and I took the one she handed to me.

“I was nothing to Carter” I tried to remind her.

“No you are everything to that man, I’ve known him for a long time. He fucked it all up for sure, I’m with you on that. Carter could be that man if he had to be but he never was with you.” she admitted.

“Right now I don’t know my mouth from my ass,” I let her know.

“I wouldn’t either if I was you.” she admitted. Lana clicked on the tv and found a lifetime movie.

“Tomorrow we will worry about the rest of it. For now let's eat ice cream and lick our wounds.” 

She had a point, but I also wondered what she meant by ‘our wounds.’ I hope this hadn’t also put a rift between Mazzie and her but as she suggested I chose to put it aside for now. I nodded and got lost in the movie and the Ice cream that tasted of ash but the cool feel numbed my throat, and ran down my gullet. That sensation felt just like my bleeding heart right now and at some point my teary, swollen eyes closed as my head rested in Lana’s lap.