The Bad Boy's Dirty Little Secret BL Chapter 37: Missing You

Kai’s P.O.V            

“What are you talking about?” I asked her wearily, not in the mood to answer her burning questions in the middle of the night. “It’s past 3AM, Kia. If you don’t have anything useful to say, I’ll get going now.”

“You ungrateful fucker!” Before I knew it a piece of plastic came hauling at me through the open windows. I dodged it right on time before it landed on the ground with a splatter and it turned out to be some half eaten food from a fast food joint that she had once again forgotten to throw out.

Typical Kia.

“Jeez, woman! Calm your ass!” I picked up the plastic before anyone saw it. “You don’t want to get arrested or fined for littering, do you? I’m too tired to bail you out at this hour.”

“Fine, don’t tell me,” she sighed, shaking her head before she narrowed her eyes at me. “But I know you well, Kai. You’ll come crying to me for help in no time! And then, I’ll find out exactly what’s going on between the two of you! Just you wait!”

With that, she turned on the engine and reversed the car out of the driveway and was well out of my hair. Finally, I could breathe a sigh of relief.

Turning to the gate, I saw the old guard give me a dirty look as he waited in his office, his hands folded across his chest. Poor guy had been woken up from his slumber in the middle of the night and now has to wait till I get inside, so he can lock the gates once again and go back to his beauty sleep.

I gave him an apologetic look and explained to him that Night has been taken to the hospital for his fever, and won’t be returning for a while.

He listened to me half-heartedly before dismissing me, not really caring about any explanations.

I simply got out of there and made my way to my room. However, turning on the lights to the empty room brought on an entirely different kind of emotion.

It’s not that I hadn't been alone in this dorm before…I had, several times, but not when I was concerned about Night and had no idea what he was doing.

What were his parents even thinking? Pulling him out of the hospital just because my sister was his doctor? And I had no doubt that it was the only reason they did it!

And what was that they called me? Bloody fag? His son’s newest attraction? His fuck buddy?

Sighing, I sat down on my bed, feeling bewildered all over again.

Did that man even listen to his own words? Did he even understand that he wasn’t insulting me but himself?

His son was gay! He liked men! And he acted like it was some kind of a disease!

I get that not all Asian parents were as open minded as to be thrilled about their son liking men, but Night’s father took the cake for being the most ridiculously delusional bastard I’d ever seen!

No wonder he did nothing when his son was getting raped by his ex while trying to figure out what or who he liked!

Night knew that his father would never believe him! That’s why he never came clean. If his reaction today was any indication…that fucker would’ve probably blamed Night instead!

God! Is this what he had been dealing with? All this time?

Is this why he doesn’t like going back home? Is this why he chose to stay in a dorm at school despite having a condo so close to campus?

All my thoughts added up, making my temples throb. I pressed my fingers to them, trying to ease some of the pain as I lay on my bed, keeping the lights on for some odd reason.

Usually, I liked to sleep when it was pitch black in the room. I hated it even if there was a single source of light in the room. But today felt different. Tonight…I turned to the empty bed next to mine and stared at the clear grey sheets as I tried and failed to fall back asleep.

Night having a fever wasn’t the only thought that I had in my mind…

I knew I was just helping him out so that he didn’t have to be embarrassed about it but…

‘Aren’t you a screamer?’ My hands pumping on his dick while Nights chin rested on my shoulder, his hands on my waist as I felt his hot breath on my neck.

‘Kai…’

I felt a shiver run down my spine, as if the remnants of his voice still lingered in the air.

I had gotten used to that voice and often time, I had found it annoying enough that I had just tuned it out, thinking of his constant whining as background noise as I worked and studied.

But tonight, I was missing that same annoying voice…missing that same annoying boy that would always make dirty jokes and try to hit on me every chance he could.

My friends had been right…Cole had been right…I was falling for Night and I was the only one who wasn’t seeing it.

Sexuality, sexual orientation and everything in between were just labels…tags that I was trying to box myself into so that I could explain myself, try and find excuses for myself.

In the end, none of them really mattered.

All that mattered was that I missed Night when he wasn’t near me. I hated it when someone else got close to him, be it a man or a woman. I loved watching him smile; watching him tease me with that wicked glint in his eyes, especially when he knows how new I am to gay terms and slangs.

But most importantly…I was in love with my fucking roommate!

“Fuck.” I muttered to myself, placing a hand over my eyes.

Had I ever been in love before? Had I ever felt this strongly for someone before in my life?

As far as my memory went, I couldn’t recall it.

I wasn’t going to be a hypocrite and say that I had been into men all along and that I had just realized it.

I liked both men and women.

Every woman that I had been in the past…be it a casual one-night stand or a few weeks relationship…I had enjoyed that time thoroughly. I had moved on from one partner to another, enjoying myself, enjoying the time we had, but no one had made me want to stay.

And the only man that made me want to stay was full of complications himself.

One thing that I could tell, after watching his parents tonight…was that Night wasn’t being treated fairly, and his parents didn’t really accept him for who he was.

Despite that, his strength was something I admired, because he still continued to be himself, no matter what other’s thought of him.

Kia’s warning rang in my ears once again, about how she thought that I would be running back to her to tell her about my problems…and right now, that was what I wanted, to tell exactly how I felt so that this monumental burden would be freed from my chest.

But I didn’t want to tell her either.

Because I wanted Night to be the first person who got to know about my feelings.

“Then I’ll wait.” I told myself, to the empty room that seemed far too big all of a sudden. It was a promise to myself, a vow that I meant to keep.

“I’ll wait till you come back…and then, there’ll be nothing holding me back.”