The Bad Boy's Dirty Little Secret BL Chapter 94: The Only Thing That Counts

Kai’s P.O.V

‘Stunned’ would be an understatement to describe how shocked I felt seeing those pictures. But I wasn’t angry, no. I just felt…genuinely surprised. It was a strange tingling feeling that travelled through my entire body and constricted my heart.

I was walking back to the office before I knew it, the magazine in my hand, opened to that spread of Night and I.

Tina and Yin had been the ones behind the making of this magazine, and it appeared that they made an unexpected ‘Favorite Ship’ section that featured us two, along with a few other couples, but they hardly got as much space as us. This wasn’t in the initial plans I sent them, so it was obviously something that they had come up with on their own.

They saw me approach, and with one glance at my hand, they knew immediately what I was going to ask them about. But before I could even open my mouth to speak, Tina and Yin quickly rushed over to my side.

“Kai! So sorry you had to find out like this,” Tina blurted out, the words gushing out of her without brakes. “We are also sorry for not asking your permission beforehand, but we couldn’t exactly reach you these past few days.”

Yin had the same guilty look on her face. “We thought of it randomly and created an online poll, and it turned out that you and Night were the most voted ship in the university,” she said, hoping to lessen the blow. “And we couldn’t afford to make our buyers disappointed by not including you two, so even if we couldn’t ask for your permission, we had to include it, so… Sorry!” She hid behind Tina, like she thought I was going to go all ballistic on them.

I wasn’t going to, but before I could even respond to them, I was interrupted by Zach slapping me on the back. Man, these people really had the habit of cutting people off out of nowhere.

“So? How long were you planning to keep this a secret, man?” Zach asked. While the other two had guilty-looking doe eyes, Zach had a jovial and teasing air around him, which I appreciated. To be honest, I felt somewhat uncomfortable with the way people walked on eggshells around me, and Zach treating me like a normal person was like a breath of fresh air.

But right then, I realized what Zach had just asked me, and I felt myself still. He didn’t ask me if my relationship with Night was real, but whether or not I was planning to tell them.

Which means… they already knew what was going on between me and Night! But why? How? When?

“How did you… when did you find out?” I asked when I finally got my thoughts sorted. “Why do you know about me and Night?”

Zach laughed again, and the anxious knots in my chest relaxed. Even though Zach could be a bit firm, when he was at ease, his playfulness was potent enough that it could make everyone around him feel at ease.

“Dude, even a slow-witted and dense guy like me could see it from Mars that you’re head over heels for that man!” He scoffed, shaking his head. “You were always looking at him with those googly heart eyes. Jeez, I could puke just thinking about it!  And you were always coming to save him like some sort of knight in shining armor. Please!”

I made a face. “I think you’re laying it on a little too thick…”

But he wasn’t finished. “And it isn’t just you either! Night also made it too damn obvious that you two were a thing! The way he looks at you, talks about you… Give me a break!”

My heart hurt at the sound of that. I knew his feelings for me were as intense as the way I felt for him, but to hear it coming from someone else…especially now… it just made the whole thing even more real.

But now it was over, and there was nothing I could do about it. I had exhausted all my options, and Night had made his choice.

“Does it make you all feel weird?” I asked them. I didn’t mean it, but my voice came out small at first. Small and afraid. I knew they weren’t the judgmental, homophobic type, but there was always that doubt, that fear in the back of my head. Especially since the whole time they knew me, I had always presented myself as straight. “Me, dating a man?”

Tina was the first to protest. “No! Not at all!” The others agreed with her when she continued, “It doesn’t matter to us who you date, Kai, as long as you are happy. In the end, that’s all that counts, anyway. Whether or not your partner is the right fit for you.”

“That’s right,” said Yin. “After all, the heart wants what it wants. Selena Gomez was right.”

“You do know that phrase existed before she released that song, right?” I joked.

“You do know I was joking right?” she shot back.

“We should all go out for drinks after all this is over,” Tina suggested, an excited glint in her eyes. “It’s been so long since I got wasted. I want to get blackout drunk, for real! Plus, it’s a double celebration: the success of Campus Hotshots and Kai’s coming out to us!”

Everyone else started nodding and suggesting places we should go to for the after party celebration, and it pained me to have to burst their bubble, but it had to be done.

“Guys…” I said, a bit hesitantly, but knowing this had to be said before they made Night feel uncomfortable about it…if he even showed up. “That… uh, that won’t be happening, I’m afraid.”

“What?” Tina frowned. “Why?”

“Because Night and I broke up already,” I finally confessed, not meeting their eyes as I stared straight at the floor.

The silence in the room was almost deafening. I didn’t have to look up at them to know how shocked they were about my revelation. And why wouldn’t they be? Night and I had been so obvious about our relationship and suddenly, when it’s time to come out, they find out that we’re no longer together.

I could tell they wanted to ask what happened, but didn’t have the courage to do so. And when I finally met their eyes, I saw the moment it clicked for them: the reason why I was missing in action for the last few days.

“Is this the reason why you dropped off the face of the earth?” Zach asked, but even with his funny way of phrasing things, he sounded completely serious.

I only nodded in response.

“Did you really want it to happen?” Yin asked. “Breaking up with Night?”

I shook my head. “I never wanted it to happen. In fact, I still love him. It’s just…” I sighed. “Our circumstances are different this time around. It’s…complicated.”

“Come on now,” Zach sighed, patting my back. “Since when has Kai Hunter ever let ‘circumstances’ stop him from getting what he wants? Does Kai Hunter even know the definition of that excuse?” The playful tone in his voice was back, but underneath his humorous way of saying things was the classic Zach who was president of the council for a reason. “If you still love Night, and if Night still loves you too, then fuck those circumstances, whatever they are, and just be together anyway.”

I appreciated how they still respected my privacy by not asking the full details of what went down between me and Night. It’s not that I didn’t trust them; it was just that I didn’t really feel like explaining such a long and taxing story all over again.

I was about to protest to Zach’s advice, to say that he didn’t know what went down so there was no way for him to know if there was still fixing this situation. But that was when a thought suddenly came to my mind.

It wasn’t just about me being afraid of the ‘circumstances’. It was about me being my determined old self that had no fear of the outcome. Maybe, just maybe…it was time to act fearless and a bit reckless one last time.

“Actually…” I said, the gears in my brain turning. “Can you three help me with something? I have a plan, and I need your support to execute it.”

The three of them exchanged looks and without a hesitation, nodded their heads. “Count me in.”