Omega Bound Chapter 50

Thane

Again, I leave Ayla like a coward. I couldn't even make it through the night cuddling her before the guilt tore through me that I was hurting her by keeping her close. That I am playing with her emotions, my emotions being hot and cold. I know I want her and shouldn't.

Oh, my emotions are hot for her and that's the problem. I am not callous enough to keep her from her fated mate. Her other half. Predetermined by the fates to be the equal she needs. The shifter to help her learn and grow. The mate destined to love her more than life itself. That person wasn't me. It apparently was that bastard Kian.

Ayla deserves better than both of us. I can't give her what she needs anyway. I am broken. That is why I have hidden away in the office today. Besides trying not to think about the constant pain today brings, drowning myself in work will take my thoughts off Little Wolf. Well, that and this whiskey. The more I am numb, the more detached from my misery I become.

I've been here all day. Drinking and working. Working and drinking. I don't have time to grieve when I think of more work for myself to do. More tasks to check on, more ideas thrown out on ways to better the pack. Maps examined time and time again. A vicious circle that keeps me from ever dealing or feeling. Everyone knows to stay clear of me today. They know to stay clear of me on my sister's day as well. A few pack members slide cards under my door. Mostly friends of my parents. Sometimes meals are left outside of my door, or trinkets in front of my room. The ones that cared for my family show it.

10 hours later I am sitting at my desk with my feet up, eyes closed, and my dark blue dress shirt half buttoned. My face has a two-day shadow, and I am out of booze. Not without a pretty good buzz though. I stupidly let my mind wander to memories of better times. Replaying family celebrations, birthdays, and our most precious memories. The thought of certain things brings me the scent in real life. My mother's garden, baking and favorite foods. The smell of blood with the hunts I had with dad. Watching him rule with pride and loyalty to the pack.

A knock at the door has me sitting upright, wiping a lone tear away from my bloodshot eyes. "Who is it?" I growl out gruffly. Maybe whoever it is moves the hell along.

Della comes in wearing a very short skirt that barely covers her ass and a crop top sweater. Her black hair falling down her back in curls. I should be aroused, but instead, I find myself wondering why anyone would wear a cropped sweater. Why wear long-sleeved shirts with bellies cut out? She-wolves are strange and clearly; I have had enough to drink.

"What do you want Della? I'm busy."

"I came to see if you are okay. I know what the day is and by the smell in here, you clearly aren't okay."

"Della, I am tired and just want to rest and be left alone. I don't want to talk about my feelings. Please leave." I sigh and rub my eyes hoping that when I remove my hands, she will be gone.

"I know you're stressed. You don't have to talk." I close my eyes groaning. Why can't people leave this room when I tell them?

Before I could say anything else, she made her way around my chair and started rubbing my shoulders. My neck and shoulders are full of knots and tension. Her hands, first unwanted now can stay as I must admit, she is damn good at this. She takes her time working down my arms and my back, sharing her own memories of my family and us as children. I would rather not think of my family as she is releasing tension in my back. That will only bring it all back, but I allow her to share while I relax.

Her hands start to slide down my chest more and her hands start to caress more than rub. I am half asleep before I realize that she has now moved to straddle me in my chair. Taking advantage of my relaxed state.

"Della what are you doing?" I ask, my voice slightly above a hoarse whisper.

"I miss you, Thane. You're stressed and tense. We both need to release some tension." She swivels her hips forward, sliding her bare heat over my dick. Of course she came without panties.

"Della, I can't" I rasp out as she keeps grinding, kissing down my neck.

"Please, Thane. I need this. You need this. Smell my arousal. Feel how much I need you." She moans out while grinding herself back and forth, close to bringing herself to orgasm.

"Della stop. I can't. Not tonight." I practically plea with her while trying to fight my own urges now to whip my dick out and shove inside her. There's only so much grinding I can take in my state before I give into the lust in front of me. No. I couldn't do that. I wouldn't. My dick, however, isn't getting the message, becoming hard against my zipper as she continues grinding into me.

"Oh Thane....oh yes. You feel so good....I am so close....oh shi...it." She mewls out while grinding against me harder. My hands fight to stay at my sides. She isn't going to stop. I should stop this. I shove my hands down on her hips, holding her in place while she comes all over my jeans. Damn it.

"You got what you came here for Della. Leave." I whisper in her ear. She lifts her head off my shoulder and stands off my lap with a huge grin on her face.

"Oh, I did NOT get what I came here for." She says flirtatiously as she hikes her skirt over her hips, turns around and bends over my desk, baring both holes to me. Expectantly waiting to be filled. I could see her wetness coating her.

I stand up behind her and place a hand on each ass cheek, squeezing hard eliciting a moan. I should be pounding into her now. Getting off and getting her the hell out of here, but I remain standing here doing nothing as memories of being with Ayla flood my mind instead. Fates, I missed her.

I wonder how she is and it soon dawns on me that she could be having a panic attack from not hearing from me today and I was too selfish to remember what happened the last time I was cold to her. Little Wolf doesn't deserve that.

"Please Alpha, please I need you." Della pleads, bringing my thoughts back to the present. She's still sprawling across my desk presented to me. She is biting her bottom lip while looking back at me. "Please Alpha." She moans loud and needy and I run my fingers down her wet slit.

"I can give you my fingers Della, nothing more and never again." I need to cut this off with her. What once went from childhood friends to friends with benefits is turning to a full blown obsession that I’m not interested in. I’ve told her repeatedly how I feel, but the buzz and her presenting herself have my dick, my sloshed brain, and my heart fighting with each other.

"But, Thane, you can't mean that."

"I do mean it Della. I want this between us done. This is how it ends."

"But why? Please tell me."

"You've gotten too close to me. It will be harder for you when you find your mate."

"I don't want to find him Thane. I want you."

"You know my rule, Della. This is over. You can have my fingers, or nothing at all." I shouldn’t offer that, but in my buzzed brain she takes it, and I never hear from her about us again.

"I don't believe you, Thane." She says while spreading her legs wider and pushing her ass more in the air, sliding her slit against my knuckles.

"I mean it Della. I am done. Why don't you take my offer so I can get the hell out of here and call it a night."

"Thane, please." She pleads over her shoulder.

"No, Della, just get up and get out." I’m over this entire situation.

"Thane, no. You don't want that."

"What I want isn't in this room!" I yell at her on the brink of losing it

"What you want, or who you want Thane?" It’s who I want, but I don’t tell her that.

As I stare down at her I feel a strong pull in my chest, and I am overcome with warmth. It spreads out from my chest through my entire body. I am overwhelmed with a sweet, calming smell that has my mouth watering and Ronan shouting *'mate'* repeatedly in my mind.

I back up and look up at my doorway. The fated mate bond snaps into place.

The sound of my name is a painful sounding, raspy whisper, coming through vocal cords not used in months. There in my doorway is a distraught looking Ayla.

My fated mate is looking at me as I am standing behind a still presented Della.