The Delta's Daughter Chapter 311

TAWNY

Late December and the cold had settled into the Capital of the New Moon Kingdom. Riocht was much chillier than Cambiador, but not cold enough for snow to settle. Whereas New Moon had a light dusting of snow and reports said they could get more.

As I stepped out of the car, I felt the bite of the cold air, a season I didn’t miss even if I had missed my father and the place I once called home.

It wasn’t until I came to New Moon that I finally felt comfortable in my own skin. My father had no choice but to raise me in packs. Unfortunately, most packs didn’t accept werecats and I spent the better half of my childhood and teen years lonely.

Years of being picked on, the target of most bullies because I was a werecat in the wolf's den. They didn’t like me, taunting me because of my race. My father did everything he could, but it was hard after my mother died. He was a warrior; it was all he knew how to do.

We moved around a lot, and with each pack we lived in, the bullying became worse. Until one Alpha suggested he transfer my father to work in the New Moon Kingdom.

King Alexander, Kellen’s father had welcomed my father, as well as me. We were only here for a few months when I met Lamia. That was the day that changed everything. My life.

When Lamia officially moved to MacTire, I stayed in New Moon. I wanted to stay close to my father. I was scared he would be too lonely. He always had me to live for, and without me around I feared he and his wolf would slip away without his mate or his child.

So I stayed here for two years, became an advisor for Kellen, and enjoyed what I did. I was accepted amongst the wolves for the first time in my life. Not only that, but they respected me and my position. Maybe it was because I was close to the future King and his Beta, but I like to think that it was of my own merit.

“Holy Moons, it's friggin cold!” Mason whines getting out of the car.

“You complained that Cambiador was too hot when we first got there,” I chuckle.

“So did you, but I will take the heat over this cold any day.” He replies.

I turn to face him, giving him a wild look and shaking my head, “Mason you grew up in MacTire, how can you say it's cold here? MacTire is probably under three feet of snow by now!”

“Yeah, well, I’ve been spoiled for the last year,” He shrugs his shoulders as if making his point. His brown locks had grown longer over the months and a few strands fell across his eyes. He needed a haircut if he was going to accompany me to the coronation.

Our banter ended when the front door to my father’s two-bedroom house opened. It wasn’t much, a small home reserved for warriors in a neighborhood just outside the Palace grounds. There were several neighborhoods just beyond the grounds.

Single warriors were encouraged to board in the dorms that were attached to Palace, but King Alexander, when he was alive, did his best to accommodate single warriors who were older, too old, and too mature for the shenanigans of the new recruits that signed up each year.

“My beautiful girl, welcome home!” My lips stretch across my face wide and excited and rush to my father, flinging myself into his open and welcoming arms. I wrap myself around him, breathing in his scent. “I missed you so much Tawny,” He says, gripping me in a crushing hug and swinging me around.

He finally puts me down and holds me at arm's length, His eyes scanning over me for the changes I’m sure he sees. “We'll talk about what's bothering you later, why don’t you introduce me to your friend for now.”

I take him in too, not oblivious to the dark circles under his eyes, or how his usually bright red hair has dulled. He's still a large man, but where I used to think his freckles danced over his pale skin, now they looked sad and bleak. My father looked older and tired, and it hurt to see him so deflated. Even though he was smiling right now, I could see it in his eyes, his heart was empty, and his wolf missed his mate. He was lonely.

“Daddy, this is Mason. He is my personal second in command. A beta of Cambiador.” I introduced my friend and confidant proudly.

“A mate?” My father questioned me.

“No,” I shook my head laughing.

“But you are mated?” My father rose a brow in question, looking between me and Mason who stood there shivering with our bags in his hands. “I can smell your scent has changed.”

Well shit, I never thought about my scent being different. “I will explain once we are inside, poor Mason is freezing. We are too used to the heat of the south.”

“Ahh yes, Sorry, Nice to meet you, Mason, Please come inside.” My father takes my bag from Mason and with his other hand gestures for us to take shelter from the cold by going inside.

Once inside the single-story home, my father drops my bag in my old room. “It’s just as you left it,” He says from behind me as I walk in and cast my eyes around the room.

It’s simple and plain with mushroom-colored walls. Old, but brightly colored artwork I had painted throughout the years, decorated the walls. Bringing the small room to life. My double bed sat against the far wall under the window.

I was itching to remove my shoes to feel the plush carpet between my toes. This was the place I had felt most comfortable throughout my youth. Albeit I’m only twenty-one years old but as a teen, this room was my solace.

“I will make a bed up for you on the pull-out couch." my father informs Mason, who politely thanks him.

We could have stayed in the Palace, or I could have at least had Mason put up there or in one of the hotels here in the capital. But Mason insisted on staying with me. I get it, a strange kingdom, plus he was worried about me still.

It had only been a week, give a few days, since we left Cambiador. The absence of Crimson was still raw but like last time, not only did I, but also my feline, seem to be handling the separation and second rejection quite well.

Juniper was placated, her anger lessened, and I felt she was happy to sit back and things play out as they would. It helped that the presence and comforting scent of my father surrounded us. His company alone calmed the cat within.

It was only a few short weeks ago that I had hoped Crimson would be here with me. That it was he, my mate, that I would proudly introduce to my father.

I feel a tug on my heartstrings at the thought and quickly try to bury those feelings of disappointment, and betrayal. Except the sadness creeps in, and I don’t want to admit that I miss him. I’m going to have to learn to live without him.

During the evening, My father cooks for us and the three of us sit around his small table eating and catching up. He and Mason talk easily, mostly about training and how we have implemented New Moon and MacTire procedures and techniques within the Cambiador army.

The conversation is light for the most part, but when Mason excuses himself to get washed up, that’s when my father decides to ask me the difficult questions. “Tell me about him,” at first, I think he means Mason, and I give him a look of confusion, “You’re mate, Tawny. Tell me about your mate. Why isn’t he here? Why have you come with another male on your arm? I expected to be meeting him not…”

I sigh out a big breath, my body sagging. I wasn’t avoiding the topic of conversation; I just didn’t know how to tell him everything that had happened between Crimson and I. Or where to begin. I mostly feared his reaction. James Johnson, my father, was a hot-blooded werewolf, a warrior through and through. I could only imagine how he and his wolf would react to the way his daughter has struggled with her mate.

But I tell him. With a heavy heart no less, but I tell him all about Kolby Crimson, how Armand had raised him, how he was engaged when I first him. I even tell him that I rejected him at first, which caused him to gasp. Wolves took mates seriously; you would rarely find a wolf who would shun the goddess's gift. But being mated to my mother, a werecat, he also understood that our race worked differently, or at least Cambiador saw the fated mate differently.

I fill him in on Tolba and how we finally mated, how we were meant to be crowned next month. I tell him everything up until the day I left Cambiador and how he betrayed me with his lies.

“And where is this Kolby Crimson now?” He sits back, listening, sipping his hot tea waiting for me to carry on and get everything out.

“I don’t know daddy,” I close my eyes, lowering my head.

“Do you love him, Tawny?” His voice is calm and soothing. Not what I expected at all. I thought he would jump up, and threaten to kill him, fly off the handle. That’s not what he did at all. “In your heart and felines, could you forgive him?”

I think for a moment, could I forgive him? Do I love him? The answer is simple. Yes. I love him, I feel empty without him by my side. There's a big gaping hole right in the center of my heart where I feel his absence. I miss Crimson, but I don’t know if I can forgive him.

“Males are stupid, Tawny. It doesn’t matter the race; we are all dumb when it comes to women. I don’t know this Kolby, but from what you tell me he is a good leader - cares about his people. He has done some dumb shit when comes to you, and that doesn’t sit well with me. However,… It also sounds like he was trying to protect you.” I open my mouth to protest my father's explanation, but he holds his hand up, placing his mug on the table with the other hand.

“I know, I know,” He says. “It may not seem like it, but as I said, men are idiots. Especially when it comes to their women. Goddess knows your mother and I didn’t have it easy. To this day, I’m still surprised she didn’t kick my ass to the curb. We had our fair share of fights in the beginning, especially when we were trying to accept that we were fated mates.

“Our life was never easy, you know this. And in the beginning, we fought it. Hard. Then one day, I watched another male make a play for your mother and that was it. I wasn’t willing to lose her.” He leans forward grabbing both my hands his large ones. His pale skin was a vast contrast to my ebony complexion. “What I’m trying to say, is if you love him, don’t let something like this put a kink in your bond. His lack of omission, in the grand scheme of things, is but a small part of what you will encounter in the future. Don’t give up on your mate Tawny. Your mother never gave up on me. No matter how difficult and stupid I was.”

I went to bed that night with a mind busier than it had ever been. Mulling over my father's advice. Thinking of him and mom. Thinking of Crimson. Wondering where it was, he went. Who he went to see. Why he felt like he couldn’t trust me and tell me.

And debating if I could honestly forgive him and put it all behind us. I loved him, but I wasn’t sure if I could forgive him. And if I couldn’t forgive him, what did that mean for the future of Cambiador? Would I even go back? Could I go back if he and I weren't together?

Sleep didn’t come easy with a mind full of woe and heartache. Eventually, I did drift off, but my sleep was fitful. Full of memories and images of our time together. His face and deep red eyes invaded my subconscious.

At one point my restless dreams turned into nightmares. Images of Crimson begging me to forgive me. His body bleeding out on the snow-covered ground as my words of rejection rang out repeatedly around us.

The look in his eyes was haunting, and even though I knew it was a dream, that it wasn’t real - It felt it. In the brightness of the snow-covered ground, I was powerless to watch as his blood pooled beneath him. The crimson liquid seeped into the white backdrop, saturating the ground. “I love you” He whispered as his eyes closed and silence engulfed me.

My heart seared with pain and my eyes wept for my loss, and it was in that moment in my unconscious state, as I watched the love of my life, life’s fade before my very eyes, did I forgive him.

I woke with a start, sweat beading over my skin, my shirt and shorts saturated, and my hair stuck to my face. “Crimson!” I almost shouted, my head still very much feeling the effects of the dream.

I reached for my phone, seeing it was stupid o’clock in the morning. Still, I dialed the number, hoping he had taken a phone, and that he would answer. After several minutes I hung up and decided to call Gillian.

She answered after several rings, I knew she had probably just gone to bed. But I was thankful that she answered. “Gillian,” I breathe out when her familiar voice comes over the phone.

“Oh Gods, Tawny, are you Okay?” Her worry warms me. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, maybe for her to be mad that I just took off. I don’t know.

“I’m ok. I was calling to see if Crimson had checked in with you yet?” My voice trailed off. I didn’t know if I had a right to ask after how we both behaved and I’m pretty sure they all heard me throw out my rejection of him.

There's a pause, before, “No. We haven't heard from him. Do you know where he went?” I shake my head no, forgetting she can't see me.

“N-No,” I clear my throat, “He didn’t tell me.” I feel tears sting the back of my eyes. Gillian must sense it because she sighs, one full of pity.

“Tawny, are you coming home?” I know it's not what she really wants to ask, but it will tell her whether or not I’m still in it. Still willing to become Cambiador’s Queen.

Part of me wants to say no, I’m home, I missed my father and I’m staying here. But just the thought brings a melancholy feeling to fall over me. I said it before and I felt it, Cambiador is my home. It’s where I belong. Whether Crimson and I can work out our differences or not, it’s where I want to be. I feel it in my bones, in my heart, and in my soul.

“I’m in New Moon, I will be home after the coronation. If you, Tristan, and Wyvern can handle everything there. I know with both our absences it might put a strain…”

Gillian cuts me off, “Don’t you dare worry about us. Enjoy your time with friends and family. We will still be here and so will the kingdom. Just come home Tawny, I miss you.”

“I promise,” I tell her truthfully. A part of me eases with the admission feeling resolved that yes, that’s where I’m meant to be.

My future is with Cambiador. I just hope it's not too late to mend mine and Crimson's relationship. He may have fucked up, but have I destroyed our bond?

*You okay princess?* Mason pushes through a mental connection. And smile knowing he really does have my back. A little guilt leaks in, because I took him away from the place, he now called home. I know Mason would follow me to the ends of the realm, but I wasn’t being fair to him.

I reply that I’m fine, he probably heard me speaking on the phone. It's nice that he worries about me. When we finally go home, home being Cambiador, mind settled on that fact, I would make sure Mason has some extended time off. He deserved to take time for himself, maybe find a mate, or fall in love.