The Lost Princess Of The Lycans Chapter 146: Returning To A Nightmare

Sarahs POV

After a fantastic night with Ray, I woke up to breakfast in bed. On the tray were eggs, bacon, toast, and fruit. Also, there was a teddy bear, some candy, and a note.

To My Dearest Queen,

I wanted to apologize for my earnest attempt to make love to you the other day. I know that you have been through a lot, and I was being selfish. You are so beautiful that I can not keep my hands off you. Your eyes are intoxicating, and your body is to die for. I love your personality. Please forgive me.

Always Love and Forever,

Your humble Servant Ray.

The note read. I was almost in tears when I read it. It was so beautiful and thoughtful. But I thought that we had already taken care of that issue. I was over it that night. He is so good to me. I want him to understand that I forgave him already. I enjoyed our evening. I finished my breakfast in bed and then went and got dressed.

I chose to wear a pair of leggings and an oversize shirt. I wanted to be comfortable today. There was no need to get dressed up or dress for business. As nothing was pressing, I needed to do. I planned to take it easy today. I was in the middle of tending to the pups when Ray came into the nursery.

I ran to him and kissed him deeply.

" Babe, that surprise this morning was beautiful," I stated.

" I meant every word beautiful," he stated.

He then informed me that he would have Doctor Bernard check in on the pups. We will also be starting to give them cereal and formula. He was concerned that my breast milk was drying up and not enough for them, which I had the same fear about. So, I was pleased that he took it upon himself to take this into his own hands and make an appointment.

While the doctor is there, I'll also have him examine me. To make sure I was doing OK. After everything, I wanted to ensure that what I was going through was normal. I had no idea what I was supposed to be experiencing as a first-time mom. Also, what about being a queen? That is one job I was learning day by day.

" Now, babe, we need to talk," he stated.

" We will be returning to the white river clan," he stated.

My heart sank hearing that I would be going back there. I knew this was coming but did not look forward to it. There, I was a slave and severely mistreated. I was not looking forward to going back there. I knew that there were going to be people who had mistreated me and who had hurt me. I was so deep in thought that I did not notice Ray pulling me into his lap. I sat in his lap, shaking uncontrollably, and cried.

I was unaware that Ray and the doctor had put me back into bed and sedated me. I woke up feeling groggy.

" What happened," I asked.

" You had a severe panic attack, my love," Ray stated.

Ray was sitting on the bed with my head in his lap. I was grateful that he was there. I had no idea I would react that way, knowing that the time was almost near. I was entirely unprepared for this. Just thinking about it was causing me to shake again. He was gently stroking my head. It was very comforting, and I felt safe.

" Baby girl, I will not let anything happen to you," Ray stated.

I believed him; I knew he would protect me with his life. The weather had started to change. It was getting dark outside because of my emotions. I was not in control right now. I was reacting. I was not trying to control anything. I was afraid, terrified, actually. I did not know what to expect, nor did I want to find out.

" I know," was how I responded to what he said.

I did not know how to respond to what he was saying.

" When do we leave," I asked.

" In a couple of days," he said.

I just laid in his lap, let him stroke my head, and played with my hair. I wanted to cry. I could feel the tears starting to fall on my cheeks. I was that scared. It has been almost a year since I visited that awful place. I have never been happier. There were so many what-ifs going through my head. I covered my ears as if that would block the thoughts and stop my mind racing. Again, I started to shake and rock.

This was stupid. I was stronger and healthier than before. So what was I so worried about? I knew I would be protected, and Ray would not let anything happen to me. I am a queen now, so it was not like I was powerless. I could have the people who hurt me put in prison or worse.

But who was I trying to impress? I was still that little girl that was held captive there. The woman who was beaten and tortured. How would I react to everything and everyone? This was going to be terrible. Luckily, I could hide in the pack house and not have to interact with anyone. The pups and I could stay out of sight. But I was the queen. There was no hiding. I knew everyone would want to see the queen.

Ray never left the bed. He held me until I quit shaking. He gently rubbed my back and whispered sweet things in my ears. I started to calm down and feel exhausted again. The clouds disappeared, and the stars could be seen. There was no moon out that I could make out through the window, but the curtain was partially covering it, so I could not see the whole sky. I wanted to see if there was a moon.

But, I was motionless. I could not will my legs to work. It was like I was frozen. I just wanted to go back to the palace. I wanted to go home and never leave it again. I could feel my eyelids getting heavy. I knew soon I would fall into a fitful sleep. I did not want to go to bed with this on my mind, but it was like my boy betrayed me. I could hear the pups crying, but again, I could not will my legs to work.

" I will go tend to the pups," Ray stated.

" Here is a T-shirt of mine. "Try and change, baby," he stated.

I weakly nodded my head. I did not know if I could sit up long enough to put the shirt on, and I was not able to function at that point. I just laid there. Soon, I could tell that the pups were asleep again. They must have needed to be changed. Ray came back with a smile on his face.

" Now, to help you change," he stated.

I gave him a weak smile. He soon disappeared into the bathroom. I heard the water turn on. He was preparing a bath. He came out of the bathroom completely naked.